Beyond disappointed that none of our resident fart accounts have commented in this thread. Clearly the clarion call of the wind broken by the fart golems haven’t yet echoed deep enough into the halls of lemmy to reach their noses.

FartsWithAnAccent
fartographer@lemmy.world
i_fart_glitter@lemmy.world
SatansMaggotyCumFart

Am definitely surprised by I_Fart_Glitter considering I know them personally lol

That’s it, your character is now wearing the magical plug of deflated bloating. It gives the wearer permanent relief from meteorism at the cost of -15 agility

My old Dm Used to occasionally run a game where everyone rolled a pc that could fit into a cartoon show, and every game was an episode of this cartoon show.

I played an anime inspired character that could turn into a robot for no reason that was ever explained, and sometimes he gained the ability to turn into different kind of robots. The character never shut up about the power of friendship, and had an ever-evolving backstory that made less and less sense as we played more one shots, including:

1. He was his own father somehow
2. he had to go go to the future to make this happen for some reason
3. he was searching for his sibling so that he could stop him from becoming my pc. His sibling was from the future and had travelled back to the past, so that he could kill my pc
4. he could telepathically communicate with plants using the power of friendship. The plants had nothing to say because they were plants
5. his father was some kind of evil god. Somehow he was still his own father. The contradiction was never explained at all
6. There was an orb in his chest that contained the source of all friendship in the universe that he could use to launch friendship based attacks for some reason

There were more details I can’t recall. When I spoke it was always long rambling monologues that sounded like terrible dubbing.

Hey don’t leave out my name sibling

fartsparkles@lemmy.world

Some may not like it but this is what the perfect campaign looks like

Ah, but you also know that much as I would like to, I have no experience with RPGs.

I’m intimidated by all the rules and details and worry that an old, though sparkly fart like me would fair as well as a boomer trying a smart phone for the first time. ‍️

Who can murder someone with a PC this excellent?

Professor Belvedere “Fartsparkles” Tinkletuft was once a respected lecturer at the Neverwinter Arcane Academy. His groundbreaking research into “transmogrified odoriferous manifestations” (or, as the students called it, fart magic) was dismissed as childish and “in poor taste.”

In protest, the Professor vowed to prove that flatulence is the ultimate illusion. Through alchemical experimentation, he discovered how to weaponize his digestive essence into arcane displays — clouds of glittering gas, illusionary stink beasts, and even gaseous duplicates of himself.

Now he roams the realms, performing “scientific demonstrations” and occasionally saving the world — usually by accident.

A wild sparkly fart appears

Rhymes with cookie

Does it really though?

I use “ʊ” for book and cook, and “ju” for duke puke.

Sadly these two rules would exclude a large percentage of the players. The main problem child player for TTRPGs seems to be finding player character build exploits and then getting mad when the DM already knew about the build and forbids it.

I can fix you.

I have it on good authority that it does.

People don’t actually play 5.5 right?

The group I’m playing with now we’re using 5.5. Anyone still playing Adventurer’s League doesn’t have a choice, 5.5 is mandatory there.

Snake with a hundred mage hands who is actually a detective called “dick-long”?

Got muh bag-o-rats and muh Great Cleave, time to start whirlin’…

I hate the 2014 rules and actually enjoy the 2024 rules so yeah lol

What caused such a big turnaround?