I want to be able to eat tomatoes
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I hate all of my food aversions. It’s embarrassing to be an adult and to be a picky eater. I also would really like to be a vegan for ethical reasons, but when I tried I realized that I don’t eat vegetables regularly enough for that be healthy.
It’s something I’ve worked really hard on and made some gains. Raw greens are okay, some cooked ones. But still, most cooked veggies are impossible for me. I really offended an ex boyfriend once because I gagged when I tried his soup. Sometimes when I’m stressed I regress. Sometimes even my complete last ditch safe foods (shit like Lunchables) don’t work either and I’ll go to sleep hungry.
Recently Facebook decided to feed me a bunch of content on ARFID, where it’s fucking boomers in the comments with the “they’ll eat it if they get hungry enough.” The classic “it’s your breakfast tomorrow.” I can’t really eat leftovers because of that shit - getting the same bowl of canned spinach three days in a row, that combination of being really fucking hungry while smelling the foulest thing imaginable.
It makes me want to punch someone in the face. There’s no fucking reason to do that to kids. So much of boomer parenting is wrapped up in this fucked up need for dictatorial control.
I’m a grown adult who will sometimes not eat for two days because my stomach decides everything is unsafe. I have lots of coping strategies from a lifetime of dealing with this, and I still couldn’t eat a tomato. Ketchup upsets and disturbs me more than human shit does - I’ve had a panic attack from a packet squirting on me.
I actively don’t want this to be the case. I would love to be able to get really into things like heirloom tomatoes, or try all kinds of fun soups. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a good kid and eat my dinner, but I just fucking couldn’t.
It’s a thing that is wrapped up endlessly in shame and embarrassment, and then on top of it all, people tell you it’s a choice to be this way. People are so shitty about something that has absolutely no impact on them.
Did you try treating it like any other fear, i.e. to reduce the fear, try slow exposure therapy?
Maybe just buy a tomato, have it sit on the table next to you. Then if at some point, that feels fine, take it in your hand for a bit and lay it down again. Once that feels fine, hold it close to your face. Once that feels fine, give it a lick. Once that feels fine, cut it open.
Always stopping of course well before if it feels too much. Etc etc until you can at least try to eat it, and even if you don’t like the taste, at least now you can handle tomatoes.
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Have you had really high quality tomatoes? My mom had an amazing garden when I was growing up. The tomatoes were fantastic! We’d sometimes cook with them or put them in things, but most of the time, we’d just slice them and add a little salt. I have yet to find tomatoes at a grocery store that hold a candle to what we grew.
Yes. They still suck because I hate tomato flavor and texture. The only way I tolerate it is in things like Bolognese, but there’s enough other flavor to override the core tomato flavor.
On another note, I would really appreciate if my saying “I dislike A” was just once not met with the attitude of “surely you just haven’t done A right”.
Like, I’m not even saying don’t say what you were going to. Just… Don’t insist it’s my fault? You could’ve just said, “that sucks, but I found that with tomatoes quality makes a huge difference - maybe if you can get your hands on high-quality ones it’s worth trying again” and it would just feel so much different.
Sorry for going off on you a little, I’m sure there was no I’ll intent on your side, but it’s reactions like yours that always make me very hesitant to even talk about food with new people. Which is kinda sad, because food can be a very awesome topic of conversation.
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I hate all of my food aversions. It’s embarrassing to be an adult and to be a picky eater. I also would really like to be a vegan for ethical reasons, but when I tried I realized that I don’t eat vegetables regularly enough for that be healthy.
It’s something I’ve worked really hard on and made some gains. Raw greens are okay, some cooked ones. But still, most cooked veggies are impossible for me. I really offended an ex boyfriend once because I gagged when I tried his soup. Sometimes when I’m stressed I regress. Sometimes even my complete last ditch safe foods (shit like Lunchables) don’t work either and I’ll go to sleep hungry.
Recently Facebook decided to feed me a bunch of content on ARFID, where it’s fucking boomers in the comments with the “they’ll eat it if they get hungry enough.” The classic “it’s your breakfast tomorrow.” I can’t really eat leftovers because of that shit - getting the same bowl of canned spinach three days in a row, that combination of being really fucking hungry while smelling the foulest thing imaginable.
It makes me want to punch someone in the face. There’s no fucking reason to do that to kids. So much of boomer parenting is wrapped up in this fucked up need for dictatorial control.
I’m a grown adult who will sometimes not eat for two days because my stomach decides everything is unsafe. I have lots of coping strategies from a lifetime of dealing with this, and I still couldn’t eat a tomato. Ketchup upsets and disturbs me more than human shit does - I’ve had a panic attack from a packet squirting on me.
I actively don’t want this to be the case. I would love to be able to get really into things like heirloom tomatoes, or try all kinds of fun soups. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a good kid and eat my dinner, but I just fucking couldn’t.
It’s a thing that is wrapped up endlessly in shame and embarrassment, and then on top of it all, people tell you it’s a choice to be this way. People are so shitty about something that has absolutely no impact on them.
I’ve seen a fair few people go through a similar problem, having trouble with food and hating that fact. Unfortunately it is a fact that you are having that issue now and will in all likelihood have that issue in the future. That said, the suffering here is coming not from the “picky eating” itself, it is the judgement and pressure which is causing most of the suffering.
Obviously it sucks for you to be unable to grab some random food from any random food stall or restaurant, not being able to eat at a food court can be annoying and not having a safe food available can lead to hungry times. That is all shitty and it sucks a lot. The problem here is that if you just had that and everyone accepted it then you would have a fairly normal experience of food with a small tweak of sometimes not being able to have something or sometimes going hungry until you can get home.
Anyone who has Celiac’s disease is in the same boat, but their experience is really different. Why? Because their needs are recognised as a medical need, therefore acceptable. Other people recognise that if they eat gluten they will have medical issues including very serious and obvious physical problems. In other words, people can’t deny their problems are real.
Neurotypicals often deny the experiences of people that they cannot relate to. They do this with autism, they do this with ADHD, they do this with PTSD, they do this with poverty. If they haven’t experienced it then it isn’t real, but once they experience it they are happy to shout from the rooftops that it is real and horrible and everyone should be kind about it.
You have a real, measurable, replicable difficulty around food. It isn’t just you. It is you, me, my partner, several of my clients, tonnes of the people in this community, and so many people around the world besides. It is normal to find that kind of sensory issue difficult to manage, but you have also been taught that it either isn’t real or you are choosing it in some way. It is real, you wouldn’t choose it if you could, and you have to live with it.
I would recommend learning about what works for you and then defending that set of strategies vigorously. If you need to have a known safe bag of jerky or a protein bar in your bag then you need that. If you need to abstain from food at an event and eat before or after, do it. You are the one who has to live your life, not them, so you should get to decide how to do it.
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I hate all of my food aversions. It’s embarrassing to be an adult and to be a picky eater. I also would really like to be a vegan for ethical reasons, but when I tried I realized that I don’t eat vegetables regularly enough for that be healthy.
It’s something I’ve worked really hard on and made some gains. Raw greens are okay, some cooked ones. But still, most cooked veggies are impossible for me. I really offended an ex boyfriend once because I gagged when I tried his soup. Sometimes when I’m stressed I regress. Sometimes even my complete last ditch safe foods (shit like Lunchables) don’t work either and I’ll go to sleep hungry.
Recently Facebook decided to feed me a bunch of content on ARFID, where it’s fucking boomers in the comments with the “they’ll eat it if they get hungry enough.” The classic “it’s your breakfast tomorrow.” I can’t really eat leftovers because of that shit - getting the same bowl of canned spinach three days in a row, that combination of being really fucking hungry while smelling the foulest thing imaginable.
It makes me want to punch someone in the face. There’s no fucking reason to do that to kids. So much of boomer parenting is wrapped up in this fucked up need for dictatorial control.
I’m a grown adult who will sometimes not eat for two days because my stomach decides everything is unsafe. I have lots of coping strategies from a lifetime of dealing with this, and I still couldn’t eat a tomato. Ketchup upsets and disturbs me more than human shit does - I’ve had a panic attack from a packet squirting on me.
I actively don’t want this to be the case. I would love to be able to get really into things like heirloom tomatoes, or try all kinds of fun soups. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a good kid and eat my dinner, but I just fucking couldn’t.
It’s a thing that is wrapped up endlessly in shame and embarrassment, and then on top of it all, people tell you it’s a choice to be this way. People are so shitty about something that has absolutely no impact on them.
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I hate all of my food aversions. It’s embarrassing to be an adult and to be a picky eater. I also would really like to be a vegan for ethical reasons, but when I tried I realized that I don’t eat vegetables regularly enough for that be healthy.
It’s something I’ve worked really hard on and made some gains. Raw greens are okay, some cooked ones. But still, most cooked veggies are impossible for me. I really offended an ex boyfriend once because I gagged when I tried his soup. Sometimes when I’m stressed I regress. Sometimes even my complete last ditch safe foods (shit like Lunchables) don’t work either and I’ll go to sleep hungry.
Recently Facebook decided to feed me a bunch of content on ARFID, where it’s fucking boomers in the comments with the “they’ll eat it if they get hungry enough.” The classic “it’s your breakfast tomorrow.” I can’t really eat leftovers because of that shit - getting the same bowl of canned spinach three days in a row, that combination of being really fucking hungry while smelling the foulest thing imaginable.
It makes me want to punch someone in the face. There’s no fucking reason to do that to kids. So much of boomer parenting is wrapped up in this fucked up need for dictatorial control.
I’m a grown adult who will sometimes not eat for two days because my stomach decides everything is unsafe. I have lots of coping strategies from a lifetime of dealing with this, and I still couldn’t eat a tomato. Ketchup upsets and disturbs me more than human shit does - I’ve had a panic attack from a packet squirting on me.
I actively don’t want this to be the case. I would love to be able to get really into things like heirloom tomatoes, or try all kinds of fun soups. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a good kid and eat my dinner, but I just fucking couldn’t.
It’s a thing that is wrapped up endlessly in shame and embarrassment, and then on top of it all, people tell you it’s a choice to be this way. People are so shitty about something that has absolutely no impact on them.
How about tomato sauce? Like with pasta or on a pizza? If that works you might have a starting point from which you can try more and more variations.
Or tomato juice? Ever tried a Bloody Mary?
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I hate all of my food aversions. It’s embarrassing to be an adult and to be a picky eater. I also would really like to be a vegan for ethical reasons, but when I tried I realized that I don’t eat vegetables regularly enough for that be healthy.
It’s something I’ve worked really hard on and made some gains. Raw greens are okay, some cooked ones. But still, most cooked veggies are impossible for me. I really offended an ex boyfriend once because I gagged when I tried his soup. Sometimes when I’m stressed I regress. Sometimes even my complete last ditch safe foods (shit like Lunchables) don’t work either and I’ll go to sleep hungry.
Recently Facebook decided to feed me a bunch of content on ARFID, where it’s fucking boomers in the comments with the “they’ll eat it if they get hungry enough.” The classic “it’s your breakfast tomorrow.” I can’t really eat leftovers because of that shit - getting the same bowl of canned spinach three days in a row, that combination of being really fucking hungry while smelling the foulest thing imaginable.
It makes me want to punch someone in the face. There’s no fucking reason to do that to kids. So much of boomer parenting is wrapped up in this fucked up need for dictatorial control.
I’m a grown adult who will sometimes not eat for two days because my stomach decides everything is unsafe. I have lots of coping strategies from a lifetime of dealing with this, and I still couldn’t eat a tomato. Ketchup upsets and disturbs me more than human shit does - I’ve had a panic attack from a packet squirting on me.
I actively don’t want this to be the case. I would love to be able to get really into things like heirloom tomatoes, or try all kinds of fun soups. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a good kid and eat my dinner, but I just fucking couldn’t.
It’s a thing that is wrapped up endlessly in shame and embarrassment, and then on top of it all, people tell you it’s a choice to be this way. People are so shitty about something that has absolutely no impact on them.
Am 26 as of this year.
My problem is when I’m stressed and/or in unfamiliar situations and (usually in connection with food) I tend to gag.
I usually calm down later on but it really ruins most outings with friends and family.So yeah…Not alone.
Edit: And being hungry only exaggerates the issue for me. So eating late outside my usual hours only increases the likelyhood even for safe environments (e.g. at home, alone in my room with no remaining obligations). This can also be induced by media like videos, movies or tv shows etc. if they hit emotionally anywhere close to home.
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I hate all of my food aversions. It’s embarrassing to be an adult and to be a picky eater. I also would really like to be a vegan for ethical reasons, but when I tried I realized that I don’t eat vegetables regularly enough for that be healthy.
It’s something I’ve worked really hard on and made some gains. Raw greens are okay, some cooked ones. But still, most cooked veggies are impossible for me. I really offended an ex boyfriend once because I gagged when I tried his soup. Sometimes when I’m stressed I regress. Sometimes even my complete last ditch safe foods (shit like Lunchables) don’t work either and I’ll go to sleep hungry.
Recently Facebook decided to feed me a bunch of content on ARFID, where it’s fucking boomers in the comments with the “they’ll eat it if they get hungry enough.” The classic “it’s your breakfast tomorrow.” I can’t really eat leftovers because of that shit - getting the same bowl of canned spinach three days in a row, that combination of being really fucking hungry while smelling the foulest thing imaginable.
It makes me want to punch someone in the face. There’s no fucking reason to do that to kids. So much of boomer parenting is wrapped up in this fucked up need for dictatorial control.
I’m a grown adult who will sometimes not eat for two days because my stomach decides everything is unsafe. I have lots of coping strategies from a lifetime of dealing with this, and I still couldn’t eat a tomato. Ketchup upsets and disturbs me more than human shit does - I’ve had a panic attack from a packet squirting on me.
I actively don’t want this to be the case. I would love to be able to get really into things like heirloom tomatoes, or try all kinds of fun soups. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a good kid and eat my dinner, but I just fucking couldn’t.
It’s a thing that is wrapped up endlessly in shame and embarrassment, and then on top of it all, people tell you it’s a choice to be this way. People are so shitty about something that has absolutely no impact on them.
I’m sorry for anyone who doesn’t like Tomatoes. A good tomato is so so scrumptious. It’s sweet yet somehow also a touch savory. I don’t know how to explain it. But not all tomatoes are created equal for sure. Heirloom tomatoes are definitely likelier to be more flavorful than some pale watery tomato you’d get on a burger from some fast food place.
I get it though, sort of, I can’t do mushrooms unless they are disguised to not feel like mushrooms. I’ll eat them for the most part if it is in a dish i can’t pick out or something, to but I won’t really enjoy it. Definitely a texture thing which fortunately seems to only really be an issue for a small amount of foods.
I used to think picky eaters were just being obstinate and difficult because they are stubborn. But for some reason when I had covid and couldn’t taste anything, like at all, I became much more conscious about the texture of foods rather than flavor. It sort of clicked for me how a person could have a strong aversion to foods based on texture from that point on.
Anyway, this comment is a lot longer than I intended to post, and now I think I’m just rambling, but to wrap it up, I wish there was a way to raise better awareness on this topic for people like me who didn’t understand. Sorry that it has played such a traumatic role in your upbringing and I hope you can find contentment with wherever your palate leads you (or doesn’t lead you).
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I hate all of my food aversions. It’s embarrassing to be an adult and to be a picky eater. I also would really like to be a vegan for ethical reasons, but when I tried I realized that I don’t eat vegetables regularly enough for that be healthy.
It’s something I’ve worked really hard on and made some gains. Raw greens are okay, some cooked ones. But still, most cooked veggies are impossible for me. I really offended an ex boyfriend once because I gagged when I tried his soup. Sometimes when I’m stressed I regress. Sometimes even my complete last ditch safe foods (shit like Lunchables) don’t work either and I’ll go to sleep hungry.
Recently Facebook decided to feed me a bunch of content on ARFID, where it’s fucking boomers in the comments with the “they’ll eat it if they get hungry enough.” The classic “it’s your breakfast tomorrow.” I can’t really eat leftovers because of that shit - getting the same bowl of canned spinach three days in a row, that combination of being really fucking hungry while smelling the foulest thing imaginable.
It makes me want to punch someone in the face. There’s no fucking reason to do that to kids. So much of boomer parenting is wrapped up in this fucked up need for dictatorial control.
I’m a grown adult who will sometimes not eat for two days because my stomach decides everything is unsafe. I have lots of coping strategies from a lifetime of dealing with this, and I still couldn’t eat a tomato. Ketchup upsets and disturbs me more than human shit does - I’ve had a panic attack from a packet squirting on me.
I actively don’t want this to be the case. I would love to be able to get really into things like heirloom tomatoes, or try all kinds of fun soups. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a good kid and eat my dinner, but I just fucking couldn’t.
It’s a thing that is wrapped up endlessly in shame and embarrassment, and then on top of it all, people tell you it’s a choice to be this way. People are so shitty about something that has absolutely no impact on them.
It may help to read up about how tomatoes used to be thought a poisonous fruit.
Until someone sat on a step and consumed a whole basket of tomatoes, to prove they are edible.
–//–
Also, try every tomato dish until you find one that is passable.
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I hate all of my food aversions. It’s embarrassing to be an adult and to be a picky eater. I also would really like to be a vegan for ethical reasons, but when I tried I realized that I don’t eat vegetables regularly enough for that be healthy.
It’s something I’ve worked really hard on and made some gains. Raw greens are okay, some cooked ones. But still, most cooked veggies are impossible for me. I really offended an ex boyfriend once because I gagged when I tried his soup. Sometimes when I’m stressed I regress. Sometimes even my complete last ditch safe foods (shit like Lunchables) don’t work either and I’ll go to sleep hungry.
Recently Facebook decided to feed me a bunch of content on ARFID, where it’s fucking boomers in the comments with the “they’ll eat it if they get hungry enough.” The classic “it’s your breakfast tomorrow.” I can’t really eat leftovers because of that shit - getting the same bowl of canned spinach three days in a row, that combination of being really fucking hungry while smelling the foulest thing imaginable.
It makes me want to punch someone in the face. There’s no fucking reason to do that to kids. So much of boomer parenting is wrapped up in this fucked up need for dictatorial control.
I’m a grown adult who will sometimes not eat for two days because my stomach decides everything is unsafe. I have lots of coping strategies from a lifetime of dealing with this, and I still couldn’t eat a tomato. Ketchup upsets and disturbs me more than human shit does - I’ve had a panic attack from a packet squirting on me.
I actively don’t want this to be the case. I would love to be able to get really into things like heirloom tomatoes, or try all kinds of fun soups. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a good kid and eat my dinner, but I just fucking couldn’t.
It’s a thing that is wrapped up endlessly in shame and embarrassment, and then on top of it all, people tell you it’s a choice to be this way. People are so shitty about something that has absolutely no impact on them.
Don’t force yourself if it’s that bad. There are a legion of different vegetables out there for you to try. I still learn about new ones every now and again.
If all else fails and you haven’t managed any vegetables in a day, have some fruit instead. Fruit, nuts and beans are the most nutritiously similar things i think.
Personally, i hate eating raw tomatoes. I love them in all other forms. If you’re dead set on trying to build up a tolerance of them, try any that show up on this list:
- Roast tomatoes
- the sauce on Pizza (the combo of tomato with cheese just balances out flavours so well, for me)
- Tomato Soup
- Fiaherman’s soup with tomatoes
- Fried tomatoes (can be out in sandwiches or fried with other stuff like mushrooms)
- tomatoes rubbed against white bread to make a sweet and thin coating
- pasta sauce (again, being mixed with herbs, spices and other vegetables can counteract the tomatoey taste)
- pickled tomatoes? If you like vinegar and tangy tastes
But i think you should focus on finding other vegetables that you like to eat because it sounds like tomatoes aren’t gonnq be your thing - the mere presence of them in these foods might be overpowering.
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Not trying to rain on your parade, but I have yet to find anything positive about tomatoes at all
they taste bad, have this really gross skin that weirds me out texture-wise, and inside is full of glibber.That being said, in general your advice is sound - I can’t eat shrimp because of the texture, but I love the flavor. Ground small enough so I don’t have to feel it against my teethe when chewing and I’m a happy camper!
I’m lucky enough that I can get myself to try almost everything at least once - but if I don’t like it after that I will refuse to eat it without remorse. I think the second part for me made trying more stuff easier, because the trying was my way to give myself permission not to like it?
Only thing I really couldn’t bring myself to try is chicken feet. I was a bit disappointed since lots of people were raving about it, but still - I genuinely tried. That’s enough for me!
But have you tried them sundried and in oil? Honest to God. They are so good that way. The flavor is better, the texture is better. Pretty sure, if your internal glibber is the same as mine, it isn’t an issue in the dry ones.
What about pizza? Or soups?
I can’t do chicken feet, either. My husband will use them in broth sometimes, and I have to pretend really, really hard I am unaware of this, or I can’t even drink the broth. But I guess that means even they have their place
Same rule about trying things. It does help to know it’s ok to quit, after trying something.
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I hate all of my food aversions. It’s embarrassing to be an adult and to be a picky eater. I also would really like to be a vegan for ethical reasons, but when I tried I realized that I don’t eat vegetables regularly enough for that be healthy.
It’s something I’ve worked really hard on and made some gains. Raw greens are okay, some cooked ones. But still, most cooked veggies are impossible for me. I really offended an ex boyfriend once because I gagged when I tried his soup. Sometimes when I’m stressed I regress. Sometimes even my complete last ditch safe foods (shit like Lunchables) don’t work either and I’ll go to sleep hungry.
Recently Facebook decided to feed me a bunch of content on ARFID, where it’s fucking boomers in the comments with the “they’ll eat it if they get hungry enough.” The classic “it’s your breakfast tomorrow.” I can’t really eat leftovers because of that shit - getting the same bowl of canned spinach three days in a row, that combination of being really fucking hungry while smelling the foulest thing imaginable.
It makes me want to punch someone in the face. There’s no fucking reason to do that to kids. So much of boomer parenting is wrapped up in this fucked up need for dictatorial control.
I’m a grown adult who will sometimes not eat for two days because my stomach decides everything is unsafe. I have lots of coping strategies from a lifetime of dealing with this, and I still couldn’t eat a tomato. Ketchup upsets and disturbs me more than human shit does - I’ve had a panic attack from a packet squirting on me.
I actively don’t want this to be the case. I would love to be able to get really into things like heirloom tomatoes, or try all kinds of fun soups. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a good kid and eat my dinner, but I just fucking couldn’t.
It’s a thing that is wrapped up endlessly in shame and embarrassment, and then on top of it all, people tell you it’s a choice to be this way. People are so shitty about something that has absolutely no impact on them.
For a very long time I couldn’t eat raw tomatoes either, until one time abroad I saw someone eating a local grown tomato as if it was an apple. That was a trigger to try eating a tomato in the same way. Bottom line: the locally grown tomatoes were in no way comparable to the tomatoes I was used to. They were firm, and their taste was… not the same but not different either. Anyway, that ended up being the tipping point to liking tomatoes, also the ones at home that are squishy and not that good. It really came down to finding a tomato that I liked, and then by proxy starting to appreciate other tomatoes. PS: so cool for trying to go vegan. Even if you don’t succeed immediately, every step on the way counts towards lowering your footprint. Managing three days vegan a week is already a 40% reduction, an accomplishment in itself.
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Find some vine ripened cherry or grape tomatoes from the local farmer’s market during the early/mid summer (or grow your own – there’s something incredibly satisfying about growing tomato plants, as they grow so large and so quickly). These will be incredibly sweet and berry-like compared to your standard grocery store beefsteak or plum tomato.
If you can handle eating those, you can, potentially, gradually work your way toward gradually less flavourful tomatoes, recontextualizing them as boring berries rather than slimy vegetables. If you can’t, you can start researching believable and sympathetic excuses that don’t make people give you Spock eyes.
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I hate all of my food aversions. It’s embarrassing to be an adult and to be a picky eater. I also would really like to be a vegan for ethical reasons, but when I tried I realized that I don’t eat vegetables regularly enough for that be healthy.
It’s something I’ve worked really hard on and made some gains. Raw greens are okay, some cooked ones. But still, most cooked veggies are impossible for me. I really offended an ex boyfriend once because I gagged when I tried his soup. Sometimes when I’m stressed I regress. Sometimes even my complete last ditch safe foods (shit like Lunchables) don’t work either and I’ll go to sleep hungry.
Recently Facebook decided to feed me a bunch of content on ARFID, where it’s fucking boomers in the comments with the “they’ll eat it if they get hungry enough.” The classic “it’s your breakfast tomorrow.” I can’t really eat leftovers because of that shit - getting the same bowl of canned spinach three days in a row, that combination of being really fucking hungry while smelling the foulest thing imaginable.
It makes me want to punch someone in the face. There’s no fucking reason to do that to kids. So much of boomer parenting is wrapped up in this fucked up need for dictatorial control.
I’m a grown adult who will sometimes not eat for two days because my stomach decides everything is unsafe. I have lots of coping strategies from a lifetime of dealing with this, and I still couldn’t eat a tomato. Ketchup upsets and disturbs me more than human shit does - I’ve had a panic attack from a packet squirting on me.
I actively don’t want this to be the case. I would love to be able to get really into things like heirloom tomatoes, or try all kinds of fun soups. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a good kid and eat my dinner, but I just fucking couldn’t.
It’s a thing that is wrapped up endlessly in shame and embarrassment, and then on top of it all, people tell you it’s a choice to be this way. People are so shitty about something that has absolutely no impact on them.
You’re not missing much.
I’d not waste energy fighting it.
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Find some vine ripened cherry or grape tomatoes from the local farmer’s market during the early/mid summer (or grow your own – there’s something incredibly satisfying about growing tomato plants, as they grow so large and so quickly). These will be incredibly sweet and berry-like compared to your standard grocery store beefsteak or plum tomato.
If you can handle eating those, you can, potentially, gradually work your way toward gradually less flavourful tomatoes, recontextualizing them as boring berries rather than slimy vegetables. If you can’t, you can start researching believable and sympathetic excuses that don’t make people give you Spock eyes.
Get a load of this guy and his huge “tomatoes.” Awfully green and pungent tomatoes, but they smoke good.
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I hate all of my food aversions. It’s embarrassing to be an adult and to be a picky eater. I also would really like to be a vegan for ethical reasons, but when I tried I realized that I don’t eat vegetables regularly enough for that be healthy.
It’s something I’ve worked really hard on and made some gains. Raw greens are okay, some cooked ones. But still, most cooked veggies are impossible for me. I really offended an ex boyfriend once because I gagged when I tried his soup. Sometimes when I’m stressed I regress. Sometimes even my complete last ditch safe foods (shit like Lunchables) don’t work either and I’ll go to sleep hungry.
Recently Facebook decided to feed me a bunch of content on ARFID, where it’s fucking boomers in the comments with the “they’ll eat it if they get hungry enough.” The classic “it’s your breakfast tomorrow.” I can’t really eat leftovers because of that shit - getting the same bowl of canned spinach three days in a row, that combination of being really fucking hungry while smelling the foulest thing imaginable.
It makes me want to punch someone in the face. There’s no fucking reason to do that to kids. So much of boomer parenting is wrapped up in this fucked up need for dictatorial control.
I’m a grown adult who will sometimes not eat for two days because my stomach decides everything is unsafe. I have lots of coping strategies from a lifetime of dealing with this, and I still couldn’t eat a tomato. Ketchup upsets and disturbs me more than human shit does - I’ve had a panic attack from a packet squirting on me.
I actively don’t want this to be the case. I would love to be able to get really into things like heirloom tomatoes, or try all kinds of fun soups. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a good kid and eat my dinner, but I just fucking couldn’t.
It’s a thing that is wrapped up endlessly in shame and embarrassment, and then on top of it all, people tell you it’s a choice to be this way. People are so shitty about something that has absolutely no impact on them.
Don’t look at content about eating disorders. It will make everything way worse.
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