“Don’t think of them as orphans! Think of them as 1/1 tokens…”

That would be an amazing MtG Enchantment Aura card:

Mobile Orphanage

During combat phase, enchanted creature may choose to attack any creature, player, or planeswalker.

Anytime enchanted creature destroys another creature, create a 1/1 copy of that creature.

“Don’t worry, we’ll take real good care of them.”

You ducked up the rules text. That creature refers to the destroyed creature. Also can’t copy players or plane wankers.

I think they got it right. If “that creature” refers to the destroyed creature, it means that if they destroyed a creature, they get a 1/1 copy of the destroyed creature, which flavor-wise is the destroyed creature’s newly-orphaned offspring, right?

Yes. But the text does explicitly mention Planeswalkers and Players. It should say if a creature is killed this way…

Also I don’t think you can say a 1/1 copy, I think it’s a copy with base power and toughness 1/1 instead.

… something, something, layers. IDK, I’m not a Judge.

Technically, they “found” themselves (to be orphans) shortly after we arrived on-scene. Helping them something something least we could do.