If spells were written how my players use them
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If I wrote a CRPG game, like an ASCII roguelike or something, I would totally include a spell that makes the target shit its pants. You could make that work, it would even be a useful thing in combat. Vampire lord misses a turn because he just shat his pants.
But, do vampires poop?
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But, do vampires poop?
They do under your spell.
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They do under your spell.
Yeah, and the shock, surprise and frankly the embarrassment that a mighty vampire lord would experience when shitting himself makes him miss a turn, also he probably becomes more vulnerable. If not physically then definitely emotionally.
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They do under your spell.
Imagine the emotional and physical damage of taking your first shit in thousands of years.
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They do under your spell.
I guess this would add some additional damage? Just imagine the horror of this happening for the first time in hundreds maybe thousands of years. There’s nothing in you, that could actually provided the necessary… “material”. So where does it come from? And then the realization sets in: you’re not alone. The fear, the feeling, the smell, the audience. This could kill someone! (٥・_・)
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cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/34436816
Presdigitation (not even gonna try to spell it right), Druidcraft, and Thaumaturgy
- Cantrip
- Does, like, whatever I fuckin’ feel like and can get away with. What do you mean Druidcraft can make buds open? No, if can make whole plants!
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cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/34436816
pathfinder (2e) fixes this by adding flavor text and/or being more specific
i totally don’t just have a group of lazy people who don’t even want to use spells
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Presdigitation (not even gonna try to spell it right), Druidcraft, and Thaumaturgy
- Cantrip
- Does, like, whatever I fuckin’ feel like and can get away with. What do you mean Druidcraft can make buds open? No, if can make whole plants!
I’d rather have this than solving every puzzle with an axe
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If I wrote a CRPG game, like an ASCII roguelike or something, I would totally include a spell that makes the target shit its pants. You could make that work, it would even be a useful thing in combat. Vampire lord misses a turn because he just shat his pants.
I homebrewed a cantrip that you could argue makes a target shit their pants just a little bit. Probably not more than a shart.
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I have a friend who plays a sorcerer who abuses the hell out of Mold Earth, Shape Water, and Create Bonfire. RAW most of the things he gets away with shouldn’t work, but the DM rarely calls him on it. His most egregious attempt was when he tried to basically part a sea Moses style by casting Create Bonfire and expanding the flame with Control Flames, intending to evaporate all the water occupying the space of the flames. This was too much even for our otherwise pretty lenient DM.
Congratulations, you just created a massive explosion of boiling steam and scalding water that’s killed the whole group, yourself included.
Smart move there sorcerer. What a way to go, cooked sous vide
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If problems don’t want to be solved they shouldn’t be hittable with an axe
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The irony being in my games I’d rather people solve things with an ace, just because so many magic users in my group use these cantrips to do absolutely insane things they aren’t supposed to do lol.
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Me and a few of my partymates had the message cantrip, and I pointed out that due to the cantrip’s effects, we can virtually “have a telepathic group chat” via those of us who have the cantrip.
At first, I tried to stick to the illusion that I act as an intermediary to those in my range but doesn’t have the cantrip, and that I identify myself before I speak up (“Megane here… blah blah blah”).
The more it went on, the more the facade broke and eventually we were just discussing strategy under the assumption that it’s “message-mediated”.
The DM allowed it, and later gave all party members an artifact that has the following effects:
- anyone with the artifact can telepathically send a message to everyone else who has the artifact (within range)
- those who have the artifact can hear any and all such messages sent through the artifact (within range)
Later on, even the range stipulation was handwaved off (within limits—basically those who are in the same scene are assumed to be in range of each other).
Near the end of the campaign, the DM reminded us through an NPC that we’re all “staring off into the distance” whenever we use this telepathic “group chat”. We basically forgot to talk to each other normally (in character).
My Aberrant Mind Sorceress had been making frequent use of her telepathy ability to communicate silently and to keep in touch with allies that went scouting away from the party. Then she opened something she was told not to and ended up with a piece of Nyarlathotep living in her mind. When she later used her telepathy on the Monk, the DM ruled that it allowed the outer god to enter his head as well. Now we had a permanent three-way group chat that neither I nor the Monk could leave, whose moderator frequently posted literal nightmare fuel, and the rest of the party was suddenly very insistent that I only communicate with them verbally from now on.
One time I tried using my telepathy on an enemy. His head exploded. Gnarly was very unhappy about me adding people to the chat without permission and suggested that I not do it again.
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That party never would have survived in 2nd ed.
I played in that party in second edition!
::: spoiler Result We did not survive. :::
