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  2. Autism
  3. [Vent] Reddit is not very friendly to me or to disabled people, it feels

[Vent] Reddit is not very friendly to me or to disabled people, it feels

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  • wendyzW wendyz

    I hate to post about Reddit on a non-Reddit platform, but come on! Reddit is super overrated, like they delete and downvote every post and comment I make whereas no one does that here. One time, they told my friend who happens to be autistic, LGBT, and a fictionkin that she “might as well just kill herself”, though that got removed, thankfully, and they call me stupid and delete my post and talk about what a stupid question it is that no one can answer when I, who is autistic, ask a question on why someone acts a certain way or why society has to be a certain way. I’M AUTISTIC. I DON’T GET QUESTIONS THAT COME NATURALLY TO EVERYONE ELSE AND I ASK QUESTIONS THAT NO ONE THINKS OF. MY BRAIN WORKS DIFFERENTLY, MR. REDDITOR!!!

    Alexander DaychildeD This user is from outside of this forum
    Alexander DaychildeD This user is from outside of this forum
    Alexander Daychilde
    wrote last edited by
    #20

    I’ve certainly had negative interactions on Lemmy and elsewhere.

    With reddit… I’m not blaming you, but communities are how they are. Different subreddits are different.

    If you’re posting in /r/autism and experiencing that, then I’d perhaps suspect the issue might be more on your end - how you’re presenting yourself. That said, there are a lot of toxic places on reddit, for sure.

    I’m essentially no longer on reddit, but I was there since 2009. I still say things that get downvotes. Mostly silly jokes that whoosh over peoples’ heads, but sometimes just randomly. It might be my fault some of the time, but it’s definitely just the way it goes. Sometimes I make a comment and expect downvotes but get upvotes; and sometimes expect upvotes and get downvotes.

    Also, “reddit” doesn’t tell anyone anything. Users on the site certainly do. They’re individuals deciding what to say, just like here - I am not Lemmy telling you any of this, I’m me. And if I was on reddit talking to you, I’d still be me.

    That said, before I almost-completely withdrew from participating in reddit, I browsed /r/all on old.reddit using RES to filter out so so very many toxic subs (and subs I wasn’t interested in).

    There’s plenty of neurospicy people on reddit (I was / limited-still-am one).

    wendyzW 1 Reply Last reply
    3
    • leojL leoj

      I feel like a lot of the unkindness and meanness is manufactured on purpose to divide us, I don’t think real people are actually that way all the time like they are on reddit, genuine kindness is rare, it wasn’t always like that at all, Reddit used to be exactly like here.

      Alexander DaychildeD This user is from outside of this forum
      Alexander DaychildeD This user is from outside of this forum
      Alexander Daychilde
      wrote last edited by
      #21

      I feel like a lot of the unkindness and meanness is manufactured on purpose to divide us,

      Fuck you, you’re wrong, you loser.

      (hopefully the bit I quoted makes it clear I’m being VERY silly and not serious ❤ )

      leojL 1 Reply Last reply
      1
      • K kenny_is_back

        That makes sense. Also remember you never have to put yourself in any “box”, just because people find it “more convenient”. If your feelings change from person to person, or from day to day, then that’s more than okay. No 2 people should live their lives completely the same way. You evolve, and learn to enjoy new things in the future. Don’t stress it as much, just do what feels right for you!

        Alexander DaychildeD This user is from outside of this forum
        Alexander DaychildeD This user is from outside of this forum
        Alexander Daychilde
        wrote last edited by
        #22

        you never have to put yourself in any “box”,

        There is a joke in here about lesbians and putting things in “boxes”, but I’m not gonna make it.

        🙂

        1 Reply Last reply
        3
        • Delilah (She/Her)T Delilah (She/Her)

          I left reddit after the reddit blackout happened. Permanently. I didn’t purge my old posts but… I’m gone and not returning until the blind community forgives them. (API changes, lots of non seeing moderators lost their ability to interact with the site. There was a blackout in protest and reddit used it for routine maintenance)

          H This user is from outside of this forum
          H This user is from outside of this forum
          HubertManne
          wrote last edited by
          #23

          I removed my posts on several occasions and they showed up when not logged in. their process for removing posts just seem to hide your own posts from your login from what I can tell.

          G 1 Reply Last reply
          3
          • Alexander DaychildeD Alexander Daychilde

            I’ve certainly had negative interactions on Lemmy and elsewhere.

            With reddit… I’m not blaming you, but communities are how they are. Different subreddits are different.

            If you’re posting in /r/autism and experiencing that, then I’d perhaps suspect the issue might be more on your end - how you’re presenting yourself. That said, there are a lot of toxic places on reddit, for sure.

            I’m essentially no longer on reddit, but I was there since 2009. I still say things that get downvotes. Mostly silly jokes that whoosh over peoples’ heads, but sometimes just randomly. It might be my fault some of the time, but it’s definitely just the way it goes. Sometimes I make a comment and expect downvotes but get upvotes; and sometimes expect upvotes and get downvotes.

            Also, “reddit” doesn’t tell anyone anything. Users on the site certainly do. They’re individuals deciding what to say, just like here - I am not Lemmy telling you any of this, I’m me. And if I was on reddit talking to you, I’d still be me.

            That said, before I almost-completely withdrew from participating in reddit, I browsed /r/all on old.reddit using RES to filter out so so very many toxic subs (and subs I wasn’t interested in).

            There’s plenty of neurospicy people on reddit (I was / limited-still-am one).

            wendyzW This user is from outside of this forum
            wendyzW This user is from outside of this forum
            wendyz
            wrote last edited by
            #24

            Thanks. I mean, I was on LesbianActually and AITAH, subs like that. And I’m poly and they were all like “YTA for having another partner…” (I said I was poly) “…and cheating on your fiancée”

            Alexander DaychildeD 1 Reply Last reply
            2
            • wendyzW wendyz

              Thanks. I mean, I was on LesbianActually and AITAH, subs like that. And I’m poly and they were all like “YTA for having another partner…” (I said I was poly) “…and cheating on your fiancée”

              Alexander DaychildeD This user is from outside of this forum
              Alexander DaychildeD This user is from outside of this forum
              Alexander Daychilde
              wrote last edited by
              #25

              I’m poly, and poly acceptance on reddit is very very low in most places. It’s funny how that works. Homophobes are all “teh gay agenda, trying 2 convert us” and LGBTA+ is like “no, fuck off, we just want to live, thanks”. Poly feels the same way - I mention poly and people push back that it’s wrong, cheating, doesn’t work. Yeah, well, it doesn’t work for you if you’re not poly in the same way if you are straight, you don’t want to fuck your own gender.

              I don’t know LesbianActually because I don’t hang out there for obvious reasons. AITAH doesn’t completely surprise me, it’s a mainstream sub. Lesbians are probably only marginally shunned, but poly? Shunned, I’m sure.

              So basically, while I’m not blaming you… you didn’t know your audience was all. Probably better to seek advise in lesbian/poly friendly spaces. Again, don’t know lesbianactually, but I would expect r/lgbt to be a little more accepting, and perhaps /r/polyamory - I think that’s the subreddit, I don’t hang out there. (In part because while I am poly, I don’t practice currently and only ever did for a short period of time, so I hate reading about others’ happiness lol)

              I’ve no clue what your submission was about, but I see enough pieces here to not be surprised it didn’t go well. I again don’t blame you. I think there’s spaces on lemmy where it also wouldn’t go well. Poly is a fringe thing to be and acceptance is somewhat low, which I think is a shame because I think if more people realized they were poly, the world would be a happier place as there’d be rather less cheating.

              I’m sorry you got banged up over there. 😞

              wendyzW 1 Reply Last reply
              4
              • Q quickenparalysespunk@lemmy.dbzer0.com

                the van is in the river

                slacktoid@lemmy.mlS This user is from outside of this forum
                slacktoid@lemmy.mlS This user is from outside of this forum
                slacktoid@lemmy.ml
                wrote last edited by
                #26

                The van is the river

                mousepotatodoesstuff@lemmy.worldM 1 Reply Last reply
                1
                • wendyzW wendyz

                  I hate to post about Reddit on a non-Reddit platform, but come on! Reddit is super overrated, like they delete and downvote every post and comment I make whereas no one does that here. One time, they told my friend who happens to be autistic, LGBT, and a fictionkin that she “might as well just kill herself”, though that got removed, thankfully, and they call me stupid and delete my post and talk about what a stupid question it is that no one can answer when I, who is autistic, ask a question on why someone acts a certain way or why society has to be a certain way. I’M AUTISTIC. I DON’T GET QUESTIONS THAT COME NATURALLY TO EVERYONE ELSE AND I ASK QUESTIONS THAT NO ONE THINKS OF. MY BRAIN WORKS DIFFERENTLY, MR. REDDITOR!!!

                  A This user is from outside of this forum
                  A This user is from outside of this forum
                  a_non_monotonic_function@lemmy.world
                  wrote last edited by
                  #27

                  Yea Lemmy isn’t much better.

                  Scotty_TreesS 1 Reply Last reply
                  3
                  • Alexander DaychildeD Alexander Daychilde

                    I’m poly, and poly acceptance on reddit is very very low in most places. It’s funny how that works. Homophobes are all “teh gay agenda, trying 2 convert us” and LGBTA+ is like “no, fuck off, we just want to live, thanks”. Poly feels the same way - I mention poly and people push back that it’s wrong, cheating, doesn’t work. Yeah, well, it doesn’t work for you if you’re not poly in the same way if you are straight, you don’t want to fuck your own gender.

                    I don’t know LesbianActually because I don’t hang out there for obvious reasons. AITAH doesn’t completely surprise me, it’s a mainstream sub. Lesbians are probably only marginally shunned, but poly? Shunned, I’m sure.

                    So basically, while I’m not blaming you… you didn’t know your audience was all. Probably better to seek advise in lesbian/poly friendly spaces. Again, don’t know lesbianactually, but I would expect r/lgbt to be a little more accepting, and perhaps /r/polyamory - I think that’s the subreddit, I don’t hang out there. (In part because while I am poly, I don’t practice currently and only ever did for a short period of time, so I hate reading about others’ happiness lol)

                    I’ve no clue what your submission was about, but I see enough pieces here to not be surprised it didn’t go well. I again don’t blame you. I think there’s spaces on lemmy where it also wouldn’t go well. Poly is a fringe thing to be and acceptance is somewhat low, which I think is a shame because I think if more people realized they were poly, the world would be a happier place as there’d be rather less cheating.

                    I’m sorry you got banged up over there. 😞

                    wendyzW This user is from outside of this forum
                    wendyzW This user is from outside of this forum
                    wendyz
                    wrote last edited by
                    #28

                    It’s ok, thank you so much 😞 It sucks LOL

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    3
                    • wendyzW wendyz

                      I hate to post about Reddit on a non-Reddit platform, but come on! Reddit is super overrated, like they delete and downvote every post and comment I make whereas no one does that here. One time, they told my friend who happens to be autistic, LGBT, and a fictionkin that she “might as well just kill herself”, though that got removed, thankfully, and they call me stupid and delete my post and talk about what a stupid question it is that no one can answer when I, who is autistic, ask a question on why someone acts a certain way or why society has to be a certain way. I’M AUTISTIC. I DON’T GET QUESTIONS THAT COME NATURALLY TO EVERYONE ELSE AND I ASK QUESTIONS THAT NO ONE THINKS OF. MY BRAIN WORKS DIFFERENTLY, MR. REDDITOR!!!

                      DFX4509BD This user is from outside of this forum
                      DFX4509BD This user is from outside of this forum
                      DFX4509B
                      wrote last edited by
                      #29

                      It’s obvious that Reddit hates disabled people since they killed alt front-ends for the blind community a while back.

                      G 1 Reply Last reply
                      19
                      • wendyzW wendyz

                        I hate to post about Reddit on a non-Reddit platform, but come on! Reddit is super overrated, like they delete and downvote every post and comment I make whereas no one does that here. One time, they told my friend who happens to be autistic, LGBT, and a fictionkin that she “might as well just kill herself”, though that got removed, thankfully, and they call me stupid and delete my post and talk about what a stupid question it is that no one can answer when I, who is autistic, ask a question on why someone acts a certain way or why society has to be a certain way. I’M AUTISTIC. I DON’T GET QUESTIONS THAT COME NATURALLY TO EVERYONE ELSE AND I ASK QUESTIONS THAT NO ONE THINKS OF. MY BRAIN WORKS DIFFERENTLY, MR. REDDITOR!!!

                        forestbeasts@pawb.socialF This user is from outside of this forum
                        forestbeasts@pawb.socialF This user is from outside of this forum
                        forestbeasts@pawb.social
                        wrote last edited by
                        #30

                        Whoof, yikes, yeah.

                        Reddit is just chock full of random harassment.

                        We’ve gotten some here too but it’s not anywhere NEAR as bad. Here we feel relatively safe using ‘we’ and signing our messages. We’ve mostly stopped using ‘we’ on reddit and I get the occasional mocking comments about signing my name.

                        – Frost

                        wendyzW 1 Reply Last reply
                        10
                        • wendyzW wendyz

                          I hate to post about Reddit on a non-Reddit platform, but come on! Reddit is super overrated, like they delete and downvote every post and comment I make whereas no one does that here. One time, they told my friend who happens to be autistic, LGBT, and a fictionkin that she “might as well just kill herself”, though that got removed, thankfully, and they call me stupid and delete my post and talk about what a stupid question it is that no one can answer when I, who is autistic, ask a question on why someone acts a certain way or why society has to be a certain way. I’M AUTISTIC. I DON’T GET QUESTIONS THAT COME NATURALLY TO EVERYONE ELSE AND I ASK QUESTIONS THAT NO ONE THINKS OF. MY BRAIN WORKS DIFFERENTLY, MR. REDDITOR!!!

                          T This user is from outside of this forum
                          T This user is from outside of this forum
                          tollana1234567@lemmy.today
                          wrote last edited by
                          #31

                          reddit will have been going hard since last year, i wouldnt put it as a personal vendetta from reddit. they ban very heavily for random things, especially if even imply certain things that can be misconstrued as something potentiall violating.

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          2
                          • slacktoid@lemmy.mlS slacktoid@lemmy.ml

                            The van is the river

                            mousepotatodoesstuff@lemmy.worldM This user is from outside of this forum
                            mousepotatodoesstuff@lemmy.worldM This user is from outside of this forum
                            mousepotatodoesstuff@lemmy.world
                            wrote last edited by
                            #32

                            The river is in the van

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            1
                            • wendyzW wendyz

                              I hate to post about Reddit on a non-Reddit platform, but come on! Reddit is super overrated, like they delete and downvote every post and comment I make whereas no one does that here. One time, they told my friend who happens to be autistic, LGBT, and a fictionkin that she “might as well just kill herself”, though that got removed, thankfully, and they call me stupid and delete my post and talk about what a stupid question it is that no one can answer when I, who is autistic, ask a question on why someone acts a certain way or why society has to be a certain way. I’M AUTISTIC. I DON’T GET QUESTIONS THAT COME NATURALLY TO EVERYONE ELSE AND I ASK QUESTIONS THAT NO ONE THINKS OF. MY BRAIN WORKS DIFFERENTLY, MR. REDDITOR!!!

                              W This user is from outside of this forum
                              W This user is from outside of this forum
                              worldsdumbestman@lemmy.today
                              wrote last edited by
                              #33

                              They are all crypto fascist trash, pretending to be left-wing.

                              Reddit should get struck by Iran next.

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              4
                              • forestbeasts@pawb.socialF forestbeasts@pawb.social

                                Whoof, yikes, yeah.

                                Reddit is just chock full of random harassment.

                                We’ve gotten some here too but it’s not anywhere NEAR as bad. Here we feel relatively safe using ‘we’ and signing our messages. We’ve mostly stopped using ‘we’ on reddit and I get the occasional mocking comments about signing my name.

                                – Frost

                                wendyzW This user is from outside of this forum
                                wendyzW This user is from outside of this forum
                                wendyz
                                wrote last edited by
                                #34

                                It is, for sure. I’m so sorry you’ve gotten so negative messages. By the way, do you maybe happen to plural?? I am too! So far, we have one other known headmate, he’s Mark! His English is not the best, though, we are natively Spanish.

                                forestbeasts@pawb.socialF 1 Reply Last reply
                                3
                                • wendyzW wendyz

                                  It is, for sure. I’m so sorry you’ve gotten so negative messages. By the way, do you maybe happen to plural?? I am too! So far, we have one other known headmate, he’s Mark! His English is not the best, though, we are natively Spanish.

                                  forestbeasts@pawb.socialF This user is from outside of this forum
                                  forestbeasts@pawb.socialF This user is from outside of this forum
                                  forestbeasts@pawb.social
                                  wrote last edited by
                                  #35

                                  Yeah!! We’re plural too! Oh that’s awesome. *wags*

                                  We have a lot of people, but most of us only showed up a couple times and just haven’t shown up again much since (they’re all still there though). We’ve got a group of like five or six people who front regularly.

                                  – Frost

                                  wendyzW 1 Reply Last reply
                                  5
                                  • wendyzW wendyz

                                    I hate to post about Reddit on a non-Reddit platform, but come on! Reddit is super overrated, like they delete and downvote every post and comment I make whereas no one does that here. One time, they told my friend who happens to be autistic, LGBT, and a fictionkin that she “might as well just kill herself”, though that got removed, thankfully, and they call me stupid and delete my post and talk about what a stupid question it is that no one can answer when I, who is autistic, ask a question on why someone acts a certain way or why society has to be a certain way. I’M AUTISTIC. I DON’T GET QUESTIONS THAT COME NATURALLY TO EVERYONE ELSE AND I ASK QUESTIONS THAT NO ONE THINKS OF. MY BRAIN WORKS DIFFERENTLY, MR. REDDITOR!!!

                                    Scotty_TreesS This user is from outside of this forum
                                    Scotty_TreesS This user is from outside of this forum
                                    Scotty_Trees
                                    wrote last edited by
                                    #36

                                    lol no one here is going to say anything nice about reddit

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    7
                                    • wendyzW wendyz

                                      I hate to post about Reddit on a non-Reddit platform, but come on! Reddit is super overrated, like they delete and downvote every post and comment I make whereas no one does that here. One time, they told my friend who happens to be autistic, LGBT, and a fictionkin that she “might as well just kill herself”, though that got removed, thankfully, and they call me stupid and delete my post and talk about what a stupid question it is that no one can answer when I, who is autistic, ask a question on why someone acts a certain way or why society has to be a certain way. I’M AUTISTIC. I DON’T GET QUESTIONS THAT COME NATURALLY TO EVERYONE ELSE AND I ASK QUESTIONS THAT NO ONE THINKS OF. MY BRAIN WORKS DIFFERENTLY, MR. REDDITOR!!!

                                      KichaeK Online
                                      KichaeK Online
                                      Kichae
                                      Forum Master
                                      wrote last edited by
                                      #37

                                      wendyz Reddit has a real problem with being built around oversized, hyperactive spaces, and sround tyrany of the majority thanks to their up/downvote mechanics. This resulte in a space where being early to a discussion and then dunking on someone or on some unpopular strawman gets you not just attention, but also a metacurrency that grants you access to more “discerning” spaces.

                                      When communities become too big, thy just become voids to scream into, because no one is reading the comments. They’re just trying to get noticed. That turns them into deeply toxiv plates that turn on anyone trying to have an actual discussion about things.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      3
                                      • A a_non_monotonic_function@lemmy.world

                                        Yea Lemmy isn’t much better.

                                        Scotty_TreesS This user is from outside of this forum
                                        Scotty_TreesS This user is from outside of this forum
                                        Scotty_Trees
                                        wrote last edited by
                                        #38

                                        lemmy never really took off and probably never will =/

                                        A 1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • Larry (he/him/his)M Larry (he/him/his)

                                          You sure said it. Society in general isn’t too friendly to disabled individuals

                                          W This user is from outside of this forum
                                          W This user is from outside of this forum
                                          worldsdumbestman@lemmy.today
                                          wrote last edited by
                                          #39

                                          You have to fit into a certain fucking mold. I didn’t ask to be here, want to be here, and I’m making plans to fuck off to some mountain, and crossbow anyone who bothers me.

                                          I just needed to be allowed to buy cheap meds that aren’t even narcotic, stimulant, or hallucinogenic, just something to reabsorb Dopamine and Noradrenaline.

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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