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  3. #agile #scrum #tech #softwaredevelopment #meme #funny

#agile #scrum #tech #softwaredevelopment #meme #funny

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agilescrumtechsoftwaredevelopmemefunny
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  • Pavel A. SamsonovP Pavel A. Samsonov

    #agile #scrum #tech #softwaredevelopment #meme #funny

    J This user is from outside of this forum
    J This user is from outside of this forum
    johnrohde
    wrote last edited by
    #22

    @PavelASamsonov @cstross SCRUM were a nice common sense idea once. Then management and consultants got hold of it.

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    • Magnus AhltorpA Magnus Ahltorp

      @crazyeddie @mwshook @PavelASamsonov There are some things that are useful in Scrum, but those things are usually what gets thrown out first.

      Then there are things like ”velocity” that is some real bullshit.

      And once you have ”leaders” imposing Scrum, it’s not self-organised anymore. So in practice it probably only works when the team is self-organised to begin with, which makes the whole framework have very limited value.

      woe2youW This user is from outside of this forum
      woe2youW This user is from outside of this forum
      woe2you
      wrote last edited by
      #23

      @ahltorp @crazyeddie @mwshook @PavelASamsonov It's all just "we suck at gathering requirements and writing specifications so we're going to dress that up as a virtue and give it a fancy name".

      Magnus AhltorpA 1 Reply Last reply
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      • Travis F WT Travis F W

        @kwramm @ahltorp @crazyeddie @mwshook @PavelASamsonov for the record, "rock solid velocity" was the end-goal of James Shore's version of Agile (not Scrum), which I have always appreciated.

        Magnus AhltorpA This user is from outside of this forum
        Magnus AhltorpA This user is from outside of this forum
        Magnus Ahltorp
        wrote last edited by
        #24

        @travisfw @kwramm The ”immutable” Scrum Guide has been updated(!) many times since I was doing anything called Scrum more than 15 years ago, and conveniently that version of the document seems hard to find, but I believe you. But even the current Scrum Guide says that ”Other sources provide patterns, processes, and insights that complement the Scrum framework”.

        Magnus AhltorpA 1 Reply Last reply
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        • Magnus AhltorpA Magnus Ahltorp

          @travisfw @kwramm The ”immutable” Scrum Guide has been updated(!) many times since I was doing anything called Scrum more than 15 years ago, and conveniently that version of the document seems hard to find, but I believe you. But even the current Scrum Guide says that ”Other sources provide patterns, processes, and insights that complement the Scrum framework”.

          Magnus AhltorpA This user is from outside of this forum
          Magnus AhltorpA This user is from outside of this forum
          Magnus Ahltorp
          wrote last edited by
          #25

          @travisfw @kwramm Velocity has been part of the Scrum story since at least then, and saying that it isn’t Scrum is like saying Trump isn’t president of the US because there’s no mention of him in the constitution.

          Magnus AhltorpA 1 Reply Last reply
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          • woe2youW woe2you

            @ahltorp @crazyeddie @mwshook @PavelASamsonov It's all just "we suck at gathering requirements and writing specifications so we're going to dress that up as a virtue and give it a fancy name".

            Magnus AhltorpA This user is from outside of this forum
            Magnus AhltorpA This user is from outside of this forum
            Magnus Ahltorp
            wrote last edited by
            #26

            @woe2you It’s not only ”we suck at gathering requirements”, it’s also ”it’s often not meaningful to gather requirements in a vacuum”. Those are actually among the good parts, having stakeholder representation in the team. ”Fancy name” is among the bad parts.

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            • Magnus AhltorpA Magnus Ahltorp

              @travisfw @kwramm Velocity has been part of the Scrum story since at least then, and saying that it isn’t Scrum is like saying Trump isn’t president of the US because there’s no mention of him in the constitution.

              Magnus AhltorpA This user is from outside of this forum
              Magnus AhltorpA This user is from outside of this forum
              Magnus Ahltorp
              wrote last edited by
              #27

              @travisfw @kwramm According to Wikipedia, the ”Scrum Guide” has only existed since 2009. Is that true? If it’s true, what holy document were people using before that to say what was Scrum and what wasn’t?

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              • Cadbury MooseC Cadbury Moose

                @mwshook @PavelASamsonov

                The Laundry books are like that, a nice Lovecraftian (or other) horror story spliced with Cold War bureaucracy and IT.

                This moose got nowhere near "death march" programming and Agile, but did have to endure ISO9000/BS5750 and "Lean", plus "Race to the bottom" Outsourcing/Offshoring, "Everything at the cheapest possible price", and every problem/change management system being worse than the one before.

                I'm retired now. I have no regrets.

                Pavel A. SamsonovP This user is from outside of this forum
                Pavel A. SamsonovP This user is from outside of this forum
                Pavel A. Samsonov
                wrote last edited by
                #28

                @Cadbury_Moose @mwshook If you liked Laundry Files you might like The Rook, Antimemetics Division, and Monday Begins on Saturday.

                Jay StephensJ 1 Reply Last reply
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                • Pavel A. SamsonovP Pavel A. Samsonov

                  @Cadbury_Moose @mwshook If you liked Laundry Files you might like The Rook, Antimemetics Division, and Monday Begins on Saturday.

                  Jay StephensJ This user is from outside of this forum
                  Jay StephensJ This user is from outside of this forum
                  Jay Stephens
                  wrote last edited by
                  #29

                  @PavelASamsonov @Cadbury_Moose @mwshook
                  +1 for antimemetics division

                  HighlandLawyerH 1 Reply Last reply
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                  • Pavel A. SamsonovP Pavel A. Samsonov

                    #agile #scrum #tech #softwaredevelopment #meme #funny

                    CatC This user is from outside of this forum
                    CatC This user is from outside of this forum
                    Cat
                    wrote last edited by
                    #30

                    @PavelASamsonov this happened to me about as literally as possible on this plane

                    1 Reply Last reply
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                    • Jay StephensJ Jay Stephens

                      @PavelASamsonov @Cadbury_Moose @mwshook
                      +1 for antimemetics division

                      HighlandLawyerH This user is from outside of this forum
                      HighlandLawyerH This user is from outside of this forum
                      HighlandLawyer
                      wrote last edited by
                      #31

                      @jaystephens @PavelASamsonov @Cadbury_Moose @mwshook
                      There is no antimemetics division

                      1 Reply Last reply
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