"What have you brought me?"

Oh god, liturgical dance #Monsterdon

"Come to me, my beauties!"

I want to sleep on a bed of boobies #Monsterdon

"It seems the only time they do anything is at night!"

Unlike this film, where nothing ever happens period. #Monsterdon

"Come to me, my beauties!"

I want to sleep on a bed of boobies #Monsterdon

And so the Yalta Conference broke up... #Monsterdon

"That's the door"

Nice work, Eagle Eye. #Monsterdon

OH GOD THIS IS STILL FLASHBACK

NOT SINCE THE AZTEC MUMMY VS THE ROBOT! #Monsterdon

...You guys forgot the boom mic, didn't you? #Monsterdon

YOUR LIGHTING SUCKS

YOUR AUDIO SUCKS

YOUR PLOT SUCKS

AND YOU SHOULD FEEL BAD ABOUT IT

#Monsterdon

"Where'd he go?"

He's ducking out of camera, dipshit. #Monsterdon

"We're gonna die!"

You're already dying on film, chief. #Monsterdon

...wait, the master's name is Voldo? The leather freak from Soul Calibur? #Monsterdon

...wait, the master's name is Voldo? The leather freak from Soul Calibur? #Monsterdon

"Water. Sick man. Water." #Monsterdon

...She has explosive boobies? #Monsterdon

They tried to kill him by making him hug a 2x4! #Monsterdon

What the *fuck* just happened? And why was it scored with a calliope? #Monsterdon

What the *fuck* just happened? And why was it scored with a calliope? #Monsterdon

"A lot of re-occuring phrases and symbols"

He's reading the script #Monsterdon

seriously, this is embarrassing #Monsterdon