This lad wants nowt. Turned over 200 pages on a 5-minute charge.

So there's reasons why I'm buying ereaders from The Past instead of a modern one:

* It's made of METAL and it feels EXPENSIVE and FANCY, and also like it'll last longer than five minutes

* It has BUTTONS - there's a big circular two-directional page-turn button on the bottom left, and when that wears out, there's MORE page turn buttons on the mid right. There's also ten buttons running down the right side of the screen - when you're in the menus, there'll be ten things to a menu, and you just press the button for the thing you want. Also there's a dedicated button to step through the font sizes. BUTTONS GALORE.

* No wifi, no internet, no accounts, no DRM, no buying a book and then getting it stolen back off you by amazon. You put books on it two ways, either by plugging it into your computer or popping out the memory card and plugging that in instead. Either way, it shows up as a removable drive, and you literally just drag-and-drop your epubs in your file manager exactly the same way you'd copy files to a flash drive. It's SO UNCOMPLICATED.

The successor to this thing was the PRS-700, my spouse has gone through three of them because they put a touchscreen on it and consequently put way less effort into the page-turn buttons, and she wore them out within a year each

They're not easily repaired either, IIRC it's not like one button per input or even a matrix, it's each button has a different value resistor attached and they all share the same wire like crap car stereo steering wheel controls

Anyway just like when I'm trying to fix a whole arcade, each one now has a bit of blue painter's tape giving it a number and note about what it needs. Each one got charged on the wall for five minutes and a boot attempted (except for the two with obviously-broken screens and the one that was all swollen up).

Most didn't get through the whole boot sequence and all they need are new batteries, a couple can be used straight-up as-is.

I figure I'll approach this the same way I fix a whole arcade, make the worst ones the best ones until they're all pretty good

Alright, number 11's the worst that I have parts to fix right now, let's do a Dan Fixes eReaders thread.

Start by taking out the four screws on the back of the ereader. They're smaller than you'll find in a laptop, very tiny, like watch screws. Take out the first one, then go downstairs for your glasses and then take out the second.

At this point you'll realise you need more light, so go ahead and log into Home Assistant and...

Once you've got four screws out there's a hidden Fifth Screw in the butt

Once all the screws are out, use a spudger to pry the butt off the ereader, getting ready to catch the volume rocker as it falls out.

Except it doesn't fall out! Sony put a captive volume rocker in this thing! Neat!

Hot tip: never use a flathead screwdriver to pry stuff, always use a plastic spudger or you'll chew up the plastic or paint no matter how careful you are and it'll look a bloody mess.

With the butt meat removed, the holes are exposed. There are three more tiny Philips screws inside, these ones are longer with a coarser thread, put them somewhere separate to the others.

With those three screws out, the case is free to flex.

Oh my GOD how swollen-up is this lithium battery

am i about to die

The cat appears, pet her until she goes away

With the cat satisfied, we can begin removing the top of the ereader, same thing, spudge it with your spudger until it spudges off

The slidey power switch also fails to fall out.

Normally when you take apart a thing that has button on the outside, all the buttons fall off. Not so with this, because in 2007 these were Rich People's Toys and the design and build quality is *chef's kiss*

Lesson: better to buy something that was Excellent secondhand than to spend the same money on something shit from Now

These two clippydoodads gotta come out, they're held in weakly with an adhesive and will come out fairly easily

Here's what they look like Out

So here comes the interesting part.

The case of these things is All One Piece. It's a just-thick-enough-to-feel-expensive aluminium sleeve that doesn't get in the way and is fairly unremarkable until one day you look all around for the seam where this was bending-brake'd out of sheet metal and THERE ISN'T ONE and you go "What the... how the hell was this made?"

And then you put that question out of your mind because you're distracted by your swollen battery.

See, I should be able to just reach in and pull the whole innards out of this aluminium sleeve in one go like a magician or an overenthusiastic butcher, but that battery's all Big and it's gonna make things complicated, so we've gotta cross our fingers and do the careful wiggleypush

A five-second flourish becomes a fifteen-minute session of sweating and cursing and hoping that the screen and various fragile electronic parts can withstand being mushed up HARD between an aluminium case and a VERY ANGRY BATTERY

Wiggle so gently and carefully

Don't you pop you bastard don't you pop

At this point, when you're about to expose the battery against a harsh aluminium transition, start thinking "Maybe I should be doing this outside"

but it's cold

Gotta lift up this connector flap to release the ribbon cable that connects to the case's buttons WHICH STILL HAVEN'T FALLEN OUT

Sony helpfully glued a massive transparent plastic chunk to the lifty-uppy part of the connector here

With the ribbon cable detached we're free to continue bringing out the ereader's innards. Any minute now we'll expose the battery