I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.
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I'm talking about all of the misogyny crap today because folks keep speaking for me and saying I'm one of Fedi's big boosters.
It's true, I do prefer this place to corporate driven social media. But I want to be abundantly clear, I don't feel welcome here. Not really.
I get garbage sent my way that would give you therapy bills. And largely, as a quirk of decentralization, most of you won't ever see it.
Fedi is like being gaslit, every time I use it. And I need to flipping say that.
Yeah, I feel that, I've definitely touched up against some pretty insane parts of the Fediverse. Honestly it's kind of difficult to get an overview sense of the general vibe of the place because of how odd and messy federation (and defederation) works.
Everything will be smooth sailing for the most part and then you run into these people with these crazy groups of people following them around who will target you for some percieved slight, and then just as quick you never see them again.
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Yeah, I feel that, I've definitely touched up against some pretty insane parts of the Fediverse. Honestly it's kind of difficult to get an overview sense of the general vibe of the place because of how odd and messy federation (and defederation) works.
Everything will be smooth sailing for the most part and then you run into these people with these crazy groups of people following them around who will target you for some percieved slight, and then just as quick you never see them again.
@contrasocial I think a big problem is that folks see "Fediverse" as "big Mastodon instances" and not all of the little actors out there who can ruin a day with hate speech, terrifying images, etc. A big part of that is the (often great) job of moderation, where dark corners are quickly cut off, but not from everyone.
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@vkc hey, thank you for posting here, I rediscovered your channel because of your Mastodon posts.
For me the moderation is a big reason to be on a managed instance
Question I had but reading your other comments suggests the answer ;D :
One thing I wondered, did your mastodon experience change when you moved from a moderated instance to your own?@shadowwwind
Managed instances aren't enough. They have the benefit of pre-blocking the awful servers, but the truly vile will open burner accounts on "too big to block" instances to harass their targets.We need software with better safety features.
The other way you can go, ofc, is blocking the big instances, but that's not helpful for anyone trying for any sort of reach.
@vkc -
@vkc yeah there's a lot of fringe folks here. Both in the good sense and the bad sense. The Internet is a public space, and that means we get to experience all the stuff that comes with that.
I am mostly grateful even for the weird ugly sad parts, because that's how you know it's real.
@SomeVeganCheeseIsOk
When someone is expressing that they've been wronged and harmed, it is not okay to respond with celebration that it is so.Walking down the street isn't any less real because you weren't stabbed.
@vkc -
@vinnie
Edit: Check https://linuxmom.net/@vkc/116008121241261673I'm not @vkc and I haven't had the same experiences (white male privilege) so I can't speak for her. Still, she's probably tired of explaining it, so here goes:
A flood of replies ranging from annoying to sadistic. Often from new accounts or new instances, possibly created just to harass her. Replies don't spread to instances where no one follows the poster, so you don't see it, but she will (because she's @mentioned). See my latest boosts on what has (not) been done to stop this.
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When people say "Veronica loves the Fediverse", they remove my agency from this place. I'm a character. They're the narrator. I don't like that.
I think for a lot of folks, Fedi is sweet. It's quiet. It's slow. But for many, many, many of us, it's this slow-rolling insanity machine where you see the WORST THINGS and nobody else does.
And to be frank and clear, I'm just talking about things from my white US perspective. I don't even get the worst of it, and I recognize that.
where you see the WORST THINGS and nobody else does
@vkc isn't it good though? I mean not the terrible things you get to see of course but that they don't get automatically amplified like they do on centralized social media. This puts people in more control. If a troll sends me some crap from some dark corner of Fedi my audience won't even see it unless I choose to do so by reacting to it. I like it that way. On big socials comments of larger and more popular posts as troll and spam fests. Here spam is almost non-existent precisely because of this.
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@SomeVeganCheeseIsOk
When someone is expressing that they've been wronged and harmed, it is not okay to respond with celebration that it is so.Walking down the street isn't any less real because you weren't stabbed.
@vkcYou are as much a part of the problem - the policing of others - as I am - having a different take on dealing with the bad bits of life.
If your distress tolerance is SO LOW that "eh, I don't mind the bad as much" is worth taking someone to task over - you might need to talk to someone.
Also? She is PERFECTLY capable as an adult woman of telling me herself that I am being a rude bitch. You, sir, come off as a bit of a wannabe white knight.
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