8d6 baby
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Sorry to be that guy. This is a repost lol
10 months is enough of a cool-down time for this meme.
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70’s grade?
“Help us, step-wizard! There’s a 40’ circle drawn on the ground and we can’t get out!”
ETA: My idea, poorly expressed, is that you don’t have to single out 70’s porn for bad acting. There is plenty of bad porn acting yet today.
“And we’re sooooooo evil! We don’t have any friends, family, loved ones, children, pets, or other responsibilities! Here we are, a victimless crime waiting to happen!”
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Played an epic-level campaign where the players started at level 20 and they really didn’t understand their own strength which led to shit like using an explosion spell in a tiny, unstable cave and getting trapped after it collapsed. But hey! They managed to kill a shitton of goblins in a single turn!
Oh, blackness shrouded in light,
Frenzied blaze clad in night.
In the name of the crimson demons,
let the collapse of thine origin manifest. -
Reminds me of that one time the village in the forest of spiders asked for our help against the resident spider queen.
We defeated her. And her spiders. And her whole castle. And the entire forest.
The village was forced to relocate elsewhere. The king of a nearby kingdom allowed them to settle in his lands, but they had to traverse the desert to reach their destination. They never discovered it was our fault.
On the bright side, we got the chance to loot their abandoned homes. Plenty of things the villagers couldn’t carry in their odyssey through the desert.
Fun times.
2000 years later, their descendants would still wear little spiders around their necks and put fake cobwebs above their beds.
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There was this Supreme Court case in 1973 "Miller v. California, during which the Supreme Court basically decided that it has to be obscene in order to be considered pornography, and then the question became, “What is legally considered to be obscene?” From that case we derive something called the “Miller Test”, which has three criteria:
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Whether “the average person, applying contemporary community standards”, would find that the work, taken as a whole, appeals to the prurient interest.
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Whether the work depicts or describes, in a patently offensive way, sexual conduct or excretory functions specifically defined by applicable state law.
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Whether the work, taken as a whole, lacks serious literary, artistic, political, or scientific value.
For a something to be considered pornographic, it must be ALL THREE criteria, with the first two criteria being left in the hands of local ordinances and governments, and the last being left sort of up to interpretation depending on a locality’s culture and values.
Well, I consider Backdoor Sluts 9 to be a work of art, so I guess it’s not porn?
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The building was on fire and it wasn’t my fault.
Dresden Files for the win, that’s one of my favorite story openings.
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Reminds me of that one time the village in the forest of spiders asked for our help against the resident spider queen.
We defeated her. And her spiders. And her whole castle. And the entire forest.
The village was forced to relocate elsewhere. The king of a nearby kingdom allowed them to settle in his lands, but they had to traverse the desert to reach their destination. They never discovered it was our fault.
On the bright side, we got the chance to loot their abandoned homes. Plenty of things the villagers couldn’t carry in their odyssey through the desert.
Fun times.
Your party is an eldritch horror.
“Be careful what you wish for”
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Your party is an eldritch horror.
“Be careful what you wish for”
It’s not even the worst thing we did.
A group of low-level bandits, desperate to raise some money for their families, attempted to rob us. I’m pretty sure the DM was expecting us to talk them down and start their side quest.
We mercilessly killed them, taking our time to do so. My warlock locked one of them in our pocket dimension and waited for him to die of asphyxiation, then resurrected him, and killed him with again Finger of Death (which turns the victim into a zombie permanently under the caster’s control).
It became my vassal and I treated it like a high-ranking officer. Gave it a nice-looking helmet, too. We had a lot of fun together. During the final battle, it led my undead army (Danse Macabre upcasted to 9th level for shits and giggles) to victory.
I shall not talk about the Fighter and Rogue’s treatment of their respective bandits. I would normally say that death is a better outcome than eternal servitude as an undead, but I’m not sure that’s the case here.
We also bullied the nicest NPC ever to grace our table into becoming a Paladin of Vengeance, but that’s a story for another day.
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Well, I consider Backdoor Sluts 9 to be a work of art, so I guess it’s not porn?
Would “the average person” agree with you?
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Would “the average person” agree with you?
The average person has one testicle, so who knows?
