@artemis it was striking to gradually move away from there, and then leave completely... and then interact over the next few years with people still there (or on the blue reskin, whatever).

Even in non-public spaces, the way they'd immediately leap on during a friendly conversation to try to be more righteous or have a better Take or pick some pedantic fuckin nano-hole in *conversation with their own people*

@sinvega
Yeah, I think people develop a fighting mentality & eventually make very little distinction between friend & foe. Everything feels like it could be an attack.

@artemis It has been an adjustment to not assume everything said to or near me is intended to start a debate. I never got into the arguments, but I definitely assumed the worst by the end of my time on Twitter.

@artemis This is really the difference between good and bad/no moderation. We shouldn't have to deal with bad faith engagement.

In that regard, Twitter was even more hellish than I realized. I wanted to be talking with people who are also trying to make the world a better place, but instead I was getting worn down & distracted by the people trying to make it worse.

We should never stop trying to make Fedi better & safer. It's not perfect. As usual, marginalized people have the worst experience.

So this is not to say "yay! We did it! It's perfect & never needs to change."

But the spaces that we build for ourselves can be so much better than what private enterprise has to offer. We can have fucking *conversations* here.

We should never stop trying to make Fedi better & safer. It's not perfect. As usual, marginalized people have the worst experience.

So this is not to say "yay! We did it! It's perfect & never needs to change."

But the spaces that we build for ourselves can be so much better than what private enterprise has to offer. We can have fucking *conversations* here.

We should never stop trying to make Fedi better & safer. It's not perfect. As usual, marginalized people have the worst experience.

So this is not to say "yay! We did it! It's perfect & never needs to change."

But the spaces that we build for ourselves can be so much better than what private enterprise has to offer. We can have fucking *conversations* here.

It’s also the difference between conscious boosting (someone must think a thing is worth boosting) and algorithmic boosting (all engagement is considered good)
@artemis @dalias

@artemis

Fedi is 'a process' rather than just 'a place'. It is always changing, and as long as it continues to change for the better, I'm in.

And frankly, it's been slow, but I have seen a lot of people—including instance admins—responding to the suggestions & critiques of marginalized people.

It's not everyone & it's not enough, but it does fucking happen here. The hard conversations happen & at least *some* people try to make this better.

One thing I love about Fedi is that it *can become better.*

@artemis I've seen more people genuinely apologise for a misunderstanding on here and then make up and move on than I have in all my time on algorithmic social media put together, where the incentive is to instead dunk on each other in an ever escalating argument for the clicks of spectators

Also, if you are having a lot of interactions with people acting in bad faith or harassing you, it is worth considering moving to an instance with stricter moderation or that blocks or restricts more problem instances.

Dicecamp has been great for me, but there are plenty of great ones out there.

I especially recommend this if you're on mastodon social. I'm really glad you signed up & joined Fedi, but you may be able to find an even better corner to call your own (but do what you want—the point is it's your choice).

"Just move instances" is not a solution to systemic problems, but if you think you could personally have a better experience, it's a thing you can try.

And frankly, it's been slow, but I have seen a lot of people—including instance admins—responding to the suggestions & critiques of marginalized people.

It's not everyone & it's not enough, but it does fucking happen here. The hard conversations happen & at least *some* people try to make this better.

One thing I love about Fedi is that it *can become better.*

@artemis not my anxious ass going "Is today the day I finally send a small note to a popular person on a popular-but-problematic instance that their instance is problematic and they should consider moving off it because it'll likely only get worse and has already responded badly to criticism... Or am I just seeking the dopamine from a chaotic low-stakes online interaction. Again."

@artemis I've seen more people genuinely apologise for a misunderstanding on here and then make up and move on than I have in all my time on algorithmic social media put together, where the incentive is to instead dunk on each other in an ever escalating argument for the clicks of spectators

@artemis I've seen more people genuinely apologise for a misunderstanding on here and then make up and move on than I have in all my time on algorithmic social media put together, where the incentive is to instead dunk on each other in an ever escalating argument for the clicks of spectators

@afewbugs @artemis I semi-frequently give random internet strangers here a “like” when I see them apologize or course-correct, just to let them know that a random internet stranger approves of their ability to apologize or recognize that there’s a misunderstanding and maybe they’re at fault or can do better.

Also, if you are having a lot of interactions with people acting in bad faith or harassing you, it is worth considering moving to an instance with stricter moderation or that blocks or restricts more problem instances.

Dicecamp has been great for me, but there are plenty of great ones out there.