Wandering Adventure Party

@datum I do not deny that. But that's a signal in itself. Understanding why they want that leads to resolving the misunderstanding. They have a reason for wanting to deceive. Oftentimes quite a sad reason.

I for one don't believe people to ever be evil in the common sense, just misguided. A worldview that looks evil from outside is oftentimes one that's very sad and insecure inside.

Understanding that might not immediately help in making the world a better place, but it does help with giving me inner peace.

@compost_funeral Easy fix. Tell them you are. Then laugh.

Humour creates critical distance and breaks up the tension for both of you. And if it doesn't (ie they don't share the laugh)... At least you had a good laugh.

@KatyElphinstone dunno if you know that proverb, someone once told me: "In the end, everything's alright. If it isn't alright yet, it isn't the end yet."

My reaction was "In the end, we're all dead."

Which is true, but a little demotivating to a lot of people. Just as plenty people seem to feel horrified when I explain the myth of Sisyphos and the philosophy of Absurdism to them, which feels very comforting to me. You just roll the stone up the hill every day while maintaining a smile and some day you don't.

Probably should mention that I was never diagnosed with autism, but a lot of these points seem quite fitting.

@KatyElphinstone sure. But a great way to trick people into thinking it's not black and white (which isn't a bad thing) is to tell them even when most unreasonable that their point is valid from their perspective.

Because it actually is. Their opinions and theories may seem incoherent and nonsensical from one's own perspective, but since their brains have produced those results they must make sense to them.

Humility helps also. To every theory there are theoretically infinite alternative theories that may also be true. So thinking one's own perspective is the only one valid is not very smart. Instead adopting a "I think it's like this or that" while also maintaining that that can never be the last truth (since it cannot) is a very good way to make people actually listen without alienating them.

It's just like there are no lies, just misunderstandings. If someone seems to not tell the truth, we just don't understand what they're saying. It's like a code that needs to be deciphered in order to understand what they actually mean, even if it seems that they are deliberately deceiving: They do it for a reason. Find out that reason and one can tell what's actually behind those words.

Psychological analysis is a great way to get to know people.