What would you do?
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Deep rectal itch
I counter with Bigby’s Vibrating Finger
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this is what magic wands are for. Staves for the more experienced
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*Grandma preps her toolkit*
Suddenly that itch isn’t so bad after all… now that you really think about it. “It’s fine grandma…false alarm.”

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Scratch it with a cucumber and then throw the cucumber at you.
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Not to get political or anything, but is this castable with a radius? Like say if we wanted to AOE a certain godawful parliamentary body.
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I SUMMON CARBRON THE TRICKSTER GOOD TO SWAP OUR BUTTHOLES
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anal sex with a ribbed condom
100s of pleasure dots
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Mmm, the magic finger

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Rectal can itch?
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Scratch it with a cucumber and then throw the cucumber at you.
Scratch it with a cucumber then take a big bite of said cucumber while maintaining Gowron levels of eye contact.
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Finally my calling.
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I cast Mage Hand and scratch it then.
Jk, I don’t cast Mage Hand.
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Deep rectal itch
I counter with Bigby’s Vibrating Finger
It’s super effective!
@UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world has fainted.
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I cast restart PC
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Scratch it with a cucumber then take a big bite of said cucumber while maintaining Gowron levels of eye contact.
Not 20 Intimidation Check
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I cast Mage Hand and scratch it then.
Jk, I don’t cast Mage Hand.
I, as a mage, just use my hand.
“Mage Hand”.
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I cast Swamp Ass!
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Scoundrel! I cast Last Season Of Your Favorite Show Never Gets Made.