Listen, I've seen tonight's film before but I guarantee that's not gonna prevent me from screaming with incredulity at several points this evening. It's that bad of a film. #Monsterdon

TURN DOWN YOUR LIGHTS

(where applicable)

#Monsterdon

And we open with the Beach That Makes You Old. #Monsterdon

BEYOND ATLANTIS

"Shit, we gotta go back." #Monsterdon

Not so much a catamaran as a Can't-amaran. #Monsterdon

She's very confused by the opening credits. Which, hey, fair. #Monsterdon

And now, the reason this film was made. #Monsterdon

Beard's pretty spirit gummy. #Monsterdon

Pretty good shot for a man with ping-pong balls over his eyes. #Monsterdon

Scene Two: Camera pans onto a pimp. ENGAGE THE CLASSY MUSIC #Monsterdon

Oh great, we found Eddie Deezen. Again. #Monsterdon

"HE'S DEAD"

Yeah no shit, I got that far >_> #Monsterdon

Man don't get buddy-buddy with the pimp, that's not gonna end well. #Monsterdon

For completeness's sake, they put a ping-pong ball on his head, too. #Monsterdon

HARDLY ANY ANIMALS WERE HARMED IN THE MAKING OF THIS FILM #Monsterdon

"We don't need him!"

Nobody needs YOU man but here you are. #Monsterdon

Aaaaand the pimp giggles like a clown #Monsterdon

We are at male perm overload here, folks. #Monsterdon

"Deal?"

Sure, I'm a skeezy scumbag, that's great #Monsterdon

"~well ♪hello~"

Ew. #Monsterdon