i think this movie is two hours long because they spend 30 total minutes on lingering shots of mountains. #monsterdon

if there's not an egg in this cave, i think we chose the wrong movie, folks. #monsterdon

shining like a bloody rembran-- oh, don't think that was in any renaissance painting i ever saw. #SoManyBlades #monsterdon

well i think it'll be easy enough to find, the damn thing's a whole-ass mountain.. #monsterdon

oh god, i think this is the """comedy""" section. #monsterdon

travel with us??? can we please not. #monsterdon

one blinking cyclops scares you? bloody wuss. #monsterdon

hey!!! there's our boy! how ya been, Mr Liam? #monsterdon

"fame? an empty purse." another secondary character wiser than the supposed protagonist. #monsterdon

lord god, can't we just leave him passed out by the side of the road please? #monsterdon

there are those who call me... tim? #monsterdon

this kid is used to humoring adults. #monsterdon

only one of you gets his axe out. why are all these "adventurers" so useless. #monsterdon

the elves are leaving middle earth. #monsterdon

dual wielding, alright, Young King bisexual confirmed. #monsterdon

i am deeply uncomfortable with this "a little too much like the inside of a body" tunnel. #monsterdon

"it is the power of the beast" no i think it's just quicksand. #monsterdon

eugh, it's like damp sawdust. nasty. #monsterdon

gollum voice: maybe "she" could do it
#monsterdon

i am worried for this puppy's future in this movie, but it's such a wild improvement over his human form that i think i'll allow it. #monsterdon