Power Word You're Not Invited To D&D Anymore
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Hey, I play in D&D games without my bestie no problem. However, I don’t play in D&D games with people who gaslight my bestie in an attempt to ostracise them. If you didn’t do that, I wouldn’t have left.
I’d say that trying to push someone out of the group, then getting kicked out of the group yourself, is a bit of a backfire.
I guess the point is that either way an undesirable gets removed from the group and you wouldn’t have to play with that person anymore. Only, the undesirable might be you. Seems to work as intended.
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As a person who spent a lot of time feeling rejected and unsure of why people were happy to be my acquaintance but not my friend, never getting any explanation why I wasn’t good enough (the answer was undiagnosed autism and the trouble with social skills that comes with that), ghosting with no explanation hurts me in my soul.
I get why people do it though. How do you know if it’s a person who was clueless to what their bad behavior and is desperate to have literally anyone tell them what they do wrong so they can change, or someone who will flip out and get violent or stalkery or super spiteful towards group members once ejected from the group? How do you know it will not spiral into some giant drama, especially if you were wrong or others disagree about if their behavior was objectionable? Conflict avoidance, whether for justified reasons or not, is very very common.
Nope, you just don’t realize that people come in all sorts of personality types, and many will just throw you away, once they have no use for you. So, it’s a picking better groups to be with problem.
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I thought the power words were something like: Next session we will be using pathfinder.
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It can also backfire if the other players decide they like them more than you, so they refuse to join the new campaign since the removed player isn’t there. You could lie and tell them the removed player just decided to back out, but since the players like each other, it won’t be long until they start asking why they left, and then everyone knows the truth.
I think one needs to address other issues if they are afraid that the entire group prefers the one they deem “toxic” over themself. If the entire party is willing to ditch one for the sake of another, I don’t think that implies a fault with the latter.
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I think ghosting is a bit much. I know it sucks to bring the player aside and have the talk if something isn’t going quite right, but I’d usually much prefer to allow them to try and course correct a bit.
One of the first times I ever joined a DnD campaign I got ghosted and it sucked. I wouldn’t want to inflict that feeling on other players if I could help it.
It is also something I also want to avoid as much as possible. I’d rather have the uncomfortable conversation with someone than ghost them and I have actually walked that walk before, having uncomfortable conversations I wanted to avoid in order to not ghost someone else. Just wanted to show empathy for people who do it and maybe provide an explanation to the rest of us wondering why others hurt us that way.
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Much easier to prematurely end the campaign because the DM is “busy with a lot of stuff” but then he does a one shot with the exact same group minus one person - Then what do you know - The one shot went so well that they want to turn it into a full campaign. Oh but, they invited a new player who is joining their new campaign and its the “just right” amount of players and they can’t really add anyone else right now, especially the person excluded, but maybe next time?
Edit: This is intended to be mostly sarcastic as this is a real funky thing to do. Ideally if you have a problem player, its better to talk it out and either solve the problem or end it on understood terms.
Grew a mustache and a mullet
Got a job at Chick-Fil-A
Citing “artistic differences”
The band broke up in May
And in June reformed without me
And they got a different name
I nuked another grandma’s apple pie
And hung my head in shame
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This is really less of a power word and more of a spirited sentence.
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Grew a mustache and a mullet
Got a job at Chick-Fil-A
Citing “artistic differences”
The band broke up in May
And in June reformed without me
And they got a different name
I nuked another grandma’s apple pie
And hung my head in shame
Ah man, I haven’t listened to Ben Folds in years. Thanks for the reminder.
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Much easier to prematurely end the campaign because the DM is “busy with a lot of stuff” but then he does a one shot with the exact same group minus one person - Then what do you know - The one shot went so well that they want to turn it into a full campaign. Oh but, they invited a new player who is joining their new campaign and its the “just right” amount of players and they can’t really add anyone else right now, especially the person excluded, but maybe next time?
Edit: This is intended to be mostly sarcastic as this is a real funky thing to do. Ideally if you have a problem player, its better to talk it out and either solve the problem or end it on understood terms.
this is the chicken shit way out
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Ah man, I haven’t listened to Ben Folds in years. Thanks for the reminder.
Honestly, me neither, but apparently those lyrics were still firmly lodged in my brain.
I think I’m going to give them another listen, too.
