Her group described D&D as “a fantasy role-playing game which uses demonology, witchcraft, voodoo, murder, rape, blasphemy, suicide, assassination, insanity, sex perversion, homosexuality, prostitution, satanic type rituals, gambling, barbarism, cannibalism, sadism, desecration, demon summoning, necromantics, divination and other teachings.”

checks notes so… the same as the bible?

I think the Bible fails on the role-playing game front and I don’t remember any voodoo, but otherwise yeah?

But math is satanism

Yep! That’s the entire appeal of the system! And I want to make absolutely sure that anyone picking up the game knows that they are getting into, because I am well aware that the fact this is my favorite game system says a lot about me as a person

You don’t even need the dice! I was definitely gambling last session when I attuned to a prosthetic eye filled with the trapped souls of everyone that’s ever used it. It gives me 60 feet of Truesight though!

Sadly, no. It was quite real. I was given some while trick or treating as a kid.

Gygax really overcomplicated 2.5

How dare you!

<I use an attack of opportunity and I throw my carrot-and-coke cocktail to Squaresinger’s face>

Here I go down the oglaf hole again

I hope not people are like that. I have a coworker insists Harry Potter is “Satan”. She has never read it watch a single book or movie.

At least not coke and buthane. That would have been worse.

Pearl-clutching “christians” used to be deathly afraid of anything

Used to be? Harry Potter was 30 years after DnD started and you had jesus jizzers freaking the fuck out about witchcraft. Nowadays some of them believe democrats are literal demons from biblical hell bringing about the end times.

Can’t fix stupid.

I bet she’d like it if you told her it was racist and anti-trans…

Truly The Greatest Country In The World !

I knew a guy who got into d&d in middle school and it drastically improved his grades.

The fact is that gaming is reading, writing, math, make believe, structured socializing, and sometimes history and sometimes art. It’s exactly like school, except fun.

No you’re thinking paleobiology.

It was a real moral panic in the 80s or 90s. To be fair, it’s one of the less deadly moral panics of the 90s. It got a lot of steam when a private detective was hired to find or investigate a troubled teen and found he had committed suicide, and he wrote a book about it and instead said he had become delusional after playing D&D, thought he was the fictional character of RPd and tried to do things his character could do, but killed him. Eventually enough people pointed out the absurdity of the story and people who knew the kid had grown up and made it very clear he committed suicide intentionally and was never delusional, the author then acknowledged he made up the story, but even more perplexing, claimed the teen met him before the suicide, he made it sounds like mere moments before, confessed to drug abuse, and said he didn’t want his parents to find out, so asked him kindly to make up a cover story for his actual actions and motives to protect his family from, or maybe just his mom. Anyway. A lot of people took this seriously, but if you’re even slightly aware of what tabletop rpgs are like is like claiming a high schooler who played too much soccer became delusional and thought he was a soccer ball, and kept trying to inflate himself until he died. I’m not saying it’s impossible, I’m just saying if that did happen, playing too much soccer wasn’t related to the delusional mental health disorder.

Chick tracks all feel like a parody of reality, the man was very disturbed, there’s a whole track about a seemingly normal couple and their seven year old daughter, and when missionaries come teach them about Jesus they ask if it’s wrong that they sexually abuse their daughter, after being told that it is in fact wrong, but luckily they can be totally forgiven through Jesus, they decide to be Christians and say the magic words that make you saved, then they promise their daughter to stop abusing her, and all of this is played like it’s really wonderful Jesus is here to save people who molest their kids for years from consequences.

No no, there’s a lot of make believe power sets you can pretend to have in there.

Oh man, do you hsbg any idea how homophobic the entire world used to be? It’s actually pretty progressive and understanding she said ‘‘homosexuality’’ and not a slur.