Nation Yearns For Relative Calm Of ‘President A Giant Pedophile’ News Cycle

WASHINGTON—Expressing deep fondness for those long-gone halcyon days, the U.S. population collectively yearned Tuesday for the relative calm of the “president is a giant pedophile” news cycle. “It was a simpler time then, back when all people wanted to talk about was the leader of the country molesting underage gir…
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https://theonion.com/nation-yearns-for-relative-calm-of-president-a-giant-pedophile-news-cycle/