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  3. Deleted my post about the sexual harassment I'd received on Fedi, because it was driving more sexual harassment toward me.

Deleted my post about the sexual harassment I'd received on Fedi, because it was driving more sexual harassment toward me.

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  • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

    Deleted my post about the sexual harassment I'd received on Fedi, because it was driving more sexual harassment toward me.

    Y'all want women on Fedi? Fight that shit. I can't do it for you.

    ChookMother 🇦🇺🦘A This user is from outside of this forum
    ChookMother 🇦🇺🦘A This user is from outside of this forum
    ChookMother 🇦🇺🦘
    wrote on last edited by
    #103

    @vkc Yeah it's amazing how, when you talk about arsehole behaviour on social media, arseholes arrive to demonstrate exactly what you were talking about.

    1 Reply Last reply
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    • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

      Deleted my post about the sexual harassment I'd received on Fedi, because it was driving more sexual harassment toward me.

      Y'all want women on Fedi? Fight that shit. I can't do it for you.

      BredrollB This user is from outside of this forum
      BredrollB This user is from outside of this forum
      Bredroll
      wrote on last edited by
      #104

      @vkc holy shit, why do assholes feel the need to come out of the swamp! so sorry you (and everyone else) have had to undure that kind of crap 😞

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      • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

        Deleted my post about the sexual harassment I'd received on Fedi, because it was driving more sexual harassment toward me.

        Y'all want women on Fedi? Fight that shit. I can't do it for you.

        a fresh pup of coffee :bowie:D This user is from outside of this forum
        a fresh pup of coffee :bowie:D This user is from outside of this forum
        a fresh pup of coffee :bowie:
        wrote on last edited by
        #105

        @vkc using the negative comments that you have gotten to add some suspends on our instance. You are better to have here than all of them combined, easily.

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        • Cobweb, Looking for WorkC Cobweb, Looking for Work

          @vkc @eq there’s a sample from a Consolidated song that’s lives rent free in my head since the late 90s and it goes “It’s men who need to inform other men about what … SHIT women go through”

          Alex PsmithA This user is from outside of this forum
          Alex PsmithA This user is from outside of this forum
          Alex Psmith
          wrote on last edited by
          #106

          @cobweb @vkc @eq Oh, they know. They support the shit, that's the problem.

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          • The CyberwitchC The Cyberwitch

            @vkc with all the bragging about how fedi is built so it can defederate and cut out unmoderated instances, maybe they should try it sometime.

            🎄🏳️‍🌈🎃🇧🇷Luana🇧🇷🎃🏳️‍🌈🎄L This user is from outside of this forum
            🎄🏳️‍🌈🎃🇧🇷Luana🇧🇷🎃🏳️‍🌈🎄L This user is from outside of this forum
            🎄🏳️‍🌈🎃🇧🇷Luana🇧🇷🎃🏳️‍🌈🎄
            wrote on last edited by
            #107

            @cyberwitch @vkc that’s exactly what instance moderators do, all the time.

            But if you self-host an instance (like Veronica does) that’s on you, you’re choosing to be your only moderator so you have to moderate. Moderating sucks, and that’s not exclusive to the fediverse at all. If you don’t want to deal with that, you can always go to an instance hosted by someone else who deals with this. There is literally nothing other people can do to defederate people from someone else’s instance (there are blocklists I think tho?).

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            • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

              Deleted my post about the sexual harassment I'd received on Fedi, because it was driving more sexual harassment toward me.

              Y'all want women on Fedi? Fight that shit. I can't do it for you.

              Julia :v_bi:J This user is from outside of this forum
              Julia :v_bi:J This user is from outside of this forum
              Julia :v_bi:
              wrote on last edited by
              #108

              @vkc@linuxmom.net this is the reason I haven't spoken out about the NUMEROUS times it's affected me

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              • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                @eq "don't let the idiots get you" - do you see how that puts it on me?

                I trust you mean well, but respectfully: no. The correct response is "men should fight back when they see this amongst themselves."

                It isn't my responsibility to "not let them get me down." It's men who need to step up and fight this battle.

                NumerfoltN This user is from outside of this forum
                NumerfoltN This user is from outside of this forum
                Numerfolt
                wrote on last edited by
                #109

                @vkc @eq Aye

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                • AlexA Alex

                  @vkc no it is not and quite frankly your response is quite obnoxious. If we can't talk about problems collectively on this shithole platform and only talk about one thing at a time than it becomes loose islands among the rest of the sewage, but fine whatever. Thank you for proving my point about how hostile this place is becoming with all you morons whining, but yet do this type of shit. Anyways, enjoy the block. I generally don't care.

                  Alex PsmithA This user is from outside of this forum
                  Alex PsmithA This user is from outside of this forum
                  Alex Psmith
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #110

                  @alex02 @vkc You are here at her sufferance, not because you have the right to say whatever the fuck you want- on a post about sexual harassment, no less. What an entitled prick.

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                  • AlexA Alex

                    @vkc no it is not and quite frankly your response is quite obnoxious. If we can't talk about problems collectively on this shithole platform and only talk about one thing at a time than it becomes loose islands among the rest of the sewage, but fine whatever. Thank you for proving my point about how hostile this place is becoming with all you morons whining, but yet do this type of shit. Anyways, enjoy the block. I generally don't care.

                    Daniel BarberD This user is from outside of this forum
                    Daniel BarberD This user is from outside of this forum
                    Daniel Barber
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #111
                    @alex02 There was nothing obnoxious or hostile about Veronica’s response to you. You did hijack the thread and make it about yourself. Don’t do that. @vkc
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                    • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                      Deleted my post about the sexual harassment I'd received on Fedi, because it was driving more sexual harassment toward me.

                      Y'all want women on Fedi? Fight that shit. I can't do it for you.

                      eskeE This user is from outside of this forum
                      eskeE This user is from outside of this forum
                      eske
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #112

                      @vkc I'll fight sexual harassment anyday.

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                      • Matthew LoxtonM Matthew Loxton

                        @RegGuy

                        I hear you, and the same situation exists wrt racism. People of color say they get a ton of racist interactions, but I don't see it, so don't respond.

                        I think three things are going on:
                        1. There are things that *I* don't perceive as racist/sexist, but are experienced as such by the target. That bc the perpetrator is modulating to escape detection
                        2. There are things that I haven't realized are racist and sexist, and I need to educate myself
                        3. I am not in those environments
                        @bob @vkc

                        Sriram "sri" Ramkrishna -  😼S This user is from outside of this forum
                        Sriram "sri" Ramkrishna -  😼S This user is from outside of this forum
                        Sriram "sri" Ramkrishna - 😼
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #113

                        @mloxton @RegGuy @bob @vkc which is why you believe women / PoC when they point it out.

                        JustBobB 1 Reply Last reply
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                        • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                          Deleted my post about the sexual harassment I'd received on Fedi, because it was driving more sexual harassment toward me.

                          Y'all want women on Fedi? Fight that shit. I can't do it for you.

                          MinaM This user is from outside of this forum
                          MinaM This user is from outside of this forum
                          Mina
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #114

                          @vkc

                          So sorry, you had to go through this!

                          Just because we're in "the good place", we shouldn't assume that misogyny, racism and other ugly stuff doesn't find its way here.

                          It definitely exists, and it often hides behind false solidarity ("They're a good one, look at all the good they wrote and did. You misunderstood and are just overreacting.")

                          Awareness is the first step.

                          Abuse has to fought everywhere!

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                          • Sriram "sri" Ramkrishna -  😼S Sriram "sri" Ramkrishna - 😼

                            @mloxton @RegGuy @bob @vkc which is why you believe women / PoC when they point it out.

                            JustBobB This user is from outside of this forum
                            JustBobB This user is from outside of this forum
                            JustBob
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #115

                            @sri @mloxton @RegGuy @vkc

                            At the same time. Ive met people whl felt they were wronged...

                            Not saying id not believe them but keeping that in mind...

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                            • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                              Deleted my post about the sexual harassment I'd received on Fedi, because it was driving more sexual harassment toward me.

                              Y'all want women on Fedi? Fight that shit. I can't do it for you.

                              Lydia SchochL This user is from outside of this forum
                              Lydia SchochL This user is from outside of this forum
                              Lydia Schoch
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #116

                              @vkc This is such a frustratingly common experience. I’m sorry it happened to you.

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                              • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                                Deleted my post about the sexual harassment I'd received on Fedi, because it was driving more sexual harassment toward me.

                                Y'all want women on Fedi? Fight that shit. I can't do it for you.

                                iamsI This user is from outside of this forum
                                iamsI This user is from outside of this forum
                                iams
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #117

                                @vkc I am sorry this happened to you. Thank you for sharing this experience (when I was young many women stayed silent -- I couldn't back them up when I didn't know what was going on and it weighs on me). I come to fedi/masto to get away from the bullshit, and I'm so sorry to know it is here too. I do my part to call out abuse when I see/hear it around me. I just want to say being dragged into a fight for existing is fucking awful, and you're not alone in being pissed-off. Fuck those assholes.

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                                • The WookieN The Wookie

                                  @vkc

                                  Sorry this happen to you. There are fighters out there but it's a tough fight and big Fediverse.

                                  Fedi needs a hashtag that is a call to action to fight harassment and bigotry. Blocking or muting isn't enough. There should be a way to call in the Calvary to defend those being attacked.

                                  Simply reply with #StompTheBully (or something) and the good guys show up to shut things down. Summon the guard dogs and we'll show up. As 6'5" father of a mess of daughters nothing makes me happier when my crew needs me for some "Big Dog Energy".

                                  Stingray's Badger FriendS This user is from outside of this forum
                                  Stingray's Badger FriendS This user is from outside of this forum
                                  Stingray's Badger Friend
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #118

                                  @NJWookie @vkc

                                  Do you think this should be separate from the #FediBlock system already in place or in addition?

                                  Gabriel Viso CarreraG The WookieN 2 Replies Last reply
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                                  • Mx VerdaM Mx Verda

                                    @eq @vkc idk how much it helps (if at all), but it might help to focus on the problem (excluding behaviours) rather than groups (humans are a let down).
                                    Like... less "the situation will always be shit" ("we can't have nice things") and more "That sounds very frustrating; I don't wish that for you or anyone else".
                                    Maybe with a dash of "I try to fight it where I can, but XYZ tends to happen. Anyone got any advice while we're on the topic?"
                                    Or "I might try [whatever other suggestions]."

                                    Idk. I'm not an expert

                                    ❣️a standard deviant +/- gravyM This user is from outside of this forum
                                    ❣️a standard deviant +/- gravyM This user is from outside of this forum
                                    ❣️a standard deviant +/- gravy
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #119

                                    @MxVerda @eq @vkc

                                    i'm sort of a... i will cut them, just point me to whom, type of person. and then secondly, fuck this system burn it down. and then thirdly, let me help in providing examples of an alternate system that is more just and serves humanity better.

                                    1 Reply Last reply
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                                    • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                                      @eq "don't let the idiots get you" - do you see how that puts it on me?

                                      I trust you mean well, but respectfully: no. The correct response is "men should fight back when they see this amongst themselves."

                                      It isn't my responsibility to "not let them get me down." It's men who need to step up and fight this battle.

                                      CheesenessC This user is from outside of this forum
                                      CheesenessC This user is from outside of this forum
                                      Cheeseness
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #120

                                      @vkc @eq Even if that were an option, we are frequently talking about attention that goes far beyond human-scale. Individuals are not equipped to process let alone cope with the volume of negative attention that someone can be subjected to the moment that some internet angrymans decide to make it a part of their lifestyle to make someone else's life unpleasant.

                                      This is a social problem with communal implications, not an individual problem that someone should be able to traverse without support.

                                      1 Reply Last reply
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                                      • Stingray's Badger FriendS Stingray's Badger Friend

                                        @NJWookie @vkc

                                        Do you think this should be separate from the #FediBlock system already in place or in addition?

                                        Gabriel Viso CarreraG This user is from outside of this forum
                                        Gabriel Viso CarreraG This user is from outside of this forum
                                        Gabriel Viso Carrera
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #121

                                        @StingrayBadger @NJWookie @vkc I don't think she's talking only about mechanisms to put in the fediverse, but also to fight this shit in every corner of life.

                                        If everyone was willing to fight this everywhere, anywhere, anytime, we shouldn't have to create a whistle to pile on the problem if we're not online or awake: all bystanders would stand up promptly at the very moment a turd jumps out his cesspit.

                                        The WookieN 1 Reply Last reply
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                                        • Veronica ExplainsV Veronica Explains

                                          Deleted my post about the sexual harassment I'd received on Fedi, because it was driving more sexual harassment toward me.

                                          Y'all want women on Fedi? Fight that shit. I can't do it for you.

                                          C SawulaC This user is from outside of this forum
                                          C SawulaC This user is from outside of this forum
                                          C Sawula
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #122

                                          @vkc fwiw you’re a great presence online and I will be checking out peertube more largely because you’re putting content on there

                                          1 Reply Last reply
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